Dear Jack and Geisha and everyone,
I don't speak Spanish (yet!) so I couldn't follow the student presentation but I did push forward to see Geisha's wonderful face lighting up and the way that her interaction with her students lit her up from inside. It was a lovely experience to share and such a pleasure to see Geisha's face again. Thank you so much for that, Geisha!
In the Jacqui Delong Masters group in Q & A with Jack, I was powerfully affected by several things.
First, during the observations about videoing oneself teaching in the classroom Jack remarked on the way the form and appearance feature prominently in the way that women educators react to themselves, (at least I understood it to be themselves rather than other women!) on video. I am astonished that I had ignored this in my own experience but it was absolutely true. I attempted to video my own classroom performance last semester (November 2010). A new camera and new software resulted in my erasing - permanently - huge chunks (over 50 minutes) of material that showed, close up, my students and their interactions with each other and with me. I was bitterly disappointed because a second video had been predominantly shot 'long', so you really couldn't see people's faces. So I saw these as 'failures' and approximations of what is really useful. Nevertheless, I put them into a 'Dropbox' folder and sent Jack the invite to see them.
Jack, when I heard you speaking to the group in this Q & A session about this focus on appearance, (and possibly self-consciousness?), I realized that I had seen my invitation as a kind of exercise in humility! And part of that exercise in humility lay in the fact that I was 'bravely exposing my appearance' :))), of which I felt ashamed, rather than hiding it. Incredibly, I hadn't *really* watched myself - I had been preoccupied with something superficial, if painful. (I planned to repeat the filming exercise, 'properly', this semester.) When I went back to it, after a brief interchange with Pip recently, I was horrified by what I saw. But what horrified me, was a sort of 'everything-about-me' - the fact that I did not mesh with my images of myself in any way! I saw myself, heavy set and heavy handed, challenging and dominating, and it was just terrible. But after I watching the Q & A session on You Tube, I went back to the footage again.
This time I pushed past my feelings about my own appearance. And this time, I *remembered* (and could see), how the student I had challenged *loved* to challenge and be challenged; it gave him a sense of being seen and met where he was. I also saw that I had let him have 'score' the final point - which validated him. And I could see the lovely moment between us at the end of the exchange - it was really warm and emanated a closeness. Then, watching my talking circle, (which I certainly dominated), I also brought into my consciousness the fact that I get through a lot of the mini-lecture part of my classes, in this way. It is true that I am heavy handed and I still see where I can leave more space for my students and where I might draw out more instead of imposing - but… When I looked at the video in my state of self-rejection (based on my appearance), I had not recalled the importance of this session in clarification for the essay they were writing. Once I got past my feelings about myself, (generated by my feelings about my own appearance), I could focus on what was really happening *which I actually knew* but had not recognized. I saw the energy and intimacy between the students. And I finally saw the validation of my approach, (which remains to be refined and improved), a mix of 'lecture' and discourse that really holds the focus of the students. All of that was already filmed, *already in there*! and I hadn't see it - or looked for it - because of the shock to my self image.
I'm astounded by this. And I think the next exercise in filming my practice will be much easier - thank you Jack!
I also very much appreciated the four criteria of writing: comprehensibility, claims supported by sufficient evidence, normative background, and authenticity. (I appreciated the Jurgen Havermass insight about authenticity becoming apparent over time and interaction.)
And finally, I really enjoyed the explanation for 'love Jack' - and your description of the discomfort it brings! I began using 'love Sara' on this list and in Bob's areol seminar, in emulation of this practice (i.e. if Jack has the courage to do something so important and uncomfortable, surely I can find it too!) And I did so in part because of the experience at the SOLES conference in SanDiego last year, where love was articulated as the core principle of our practice - and was flowing all over the place, all the time! I have found that doing this has brought me into alignment with my own belief, that the natural state of relationship between all human beings, the ones we don't know as well as the ones we do, is love. And the love I have felt here, for people I have never met and may never meet, has been a profound validation of that belief such that it has moved from being a belief to becoming a truth that I know.
Love and thanks
Sara
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From: Practitioner-Researcher [[log in to unmask]] On Behalf Of Jack Whitehead [[log in to unmask]]
Sent: Saturday, March 05, 2011 12:16 PM
To: [log in to unmask]
Subject: Re: Thank you Geisha! How to establish an environment that calls out the most and the best of everyone
On 5 Mar 2011, at 02:23, Kathy Bauman wrote:
Hello,
Thank you for allowing my cohort to see this video clip tomorrow. They will really appreciate it. Jack, I can down load a copy onto a USB key if you wish in case there is any problem with access for class tomorrow.
All the best,
Kathy Bauman
Dear Geisha, Kathy and all - Geisha's video with her students can now be accessed from YouTube at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gb0KVP46TdE
Kathy - great to see on SKYPE your MA group from Brock University in Canada working with Jaqueline Delong. I enjoyed responding to questions from the group this afternoon UK time, - this morning your time. The video of the question and answer session is already on YouTube at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LakZDfSXq80 .
I was asked by one of the participants if I knew of any action research being carried out with pupils and I sent back the following:
The url for the Branko Bognar and Marica Zovko paper on:
"Pupils as action researchers: improving something important in our lives"
is http://ejolts.net/node/82
The url for
Joy Mounter's Understanding Learning and Learners Masters assignment on:
"Can children carry out action research about learning, creating their own learning theory?"
is
http://www.actionresearch.net/writings/tuesdayma/joymounterull.pdf
I'm hoping that these conversation are contributing to establishing an environment that calls out the most and the best of everyone.
Jill - I know that you were having a problem submitting a paper to the Educational Journal of Living Theories (EJOLTS). Branko has sorted out the problem with the submission form at http://ejolts.net/sform and I'm looking forward to reading your paper.
Love Jack.
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