I think I like the sharpness (& shortness therefore) of he first, Bill; tough i see Andrew’s point. It got me thinking of the famous poem about the Night time train station, with its final line (can’t recall the poet’s name right now); but something like that would personalize it through tone…
Doug
> On Apr 12, 2017, at 4:02 AM, Bill Wootton <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>
> Thanks Andrew, Patrick.
>
> A second stab at it here:
>
> Daylesford 2
>
> This bristling block of almost city
> with its hipster cafes, hair salons,
> bookshops, retro furniturers,
> woolshops and wineshops,
> two-storey bank buildings and
> the arcade-banished Rex theatre,
> eases off to country at either end.
>
> Two glistening fountains bracket the strip,
> one gothic lit down the post office end,
> one at full splash near the chainsaw shop,
> viewable from a corner table at the Taj.
> And always, volcanic-soiled Wombat Hill
> looms over the Convent's grey balconies,
> high above all-season manicured gardens.
>
> Mauve flowered kiss-me-quicks,
> agapanthus spears and bluebells burst
> from the soil. Swiss-Italian planted pines,
> elms, red oaks, birches and copper beeches
> share grassy gullies and steep ridges
> with mannagums and candlebarks
> all the way to Hepburn Springs.
>
> Still feels country, no dormitory town; no
> city-linked train's trundled here since 1974.
> Chimneys ease woodsmoke at dusk,
> horse poo sells at the side of the road,
> Sunday markets draw, as do parades
> at New Year and Chillout. All generally
> welcome under this Rainbow.
>
> bw
> 12.4.17
>
> Bill
>
>
> On Wed, 12 Apr 2017 at 5:51 PM, Patrick McManus <
> [log in to unmask]> wrote:
>
>> Thanks Bill sort of nostalgia feel to it -reminds me of when I stayed in
>> Nimbin
>>
>> kissmequicks new to me very Victorian type word
>>
>>
>> On 11/04/2017 22:39, Bill Wootton wrote:
>>> Daylesford
>>>
>>> Bristling block of almost city
>>> Either end eases off to country.
>>> Cafes, clobber, art, books,
>>> Pottery, haircuts, furniture chic.
>>> Two-storey bank buildings,
>>> Rex theatre, up an arcade.
>>>
>>> Two glistening fountains, one
>>> down the post office end, one near
>>> the chainsaw shop, viewable
>>> from a corner table at the Taj.
>>> Wombat Hill looming over
>>> The Convent's grey balconies.
>>>
>>> Mauve kissmequicks, agapanthus
>>> and bluebells bursting from the soil,
>>> Swiss-Italian planted pines,
>>> elms, red oaks, copper beeches
>>> sharing grassy gullies and ridges
>>> with mannagums, candlebarks.
>>>
>>> Just a country town but not
>>> a dormitory town; no city-linked train
>>> since 1974. Knows the value of parades
>>> at New Year and Chillout Festival
>>> All generally welcome somewhere
>>> under its Rainbow.
>>>
>>> bw
>>> 12.4.17
>>
Douglas Barbour
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https://eclecticruckus.wordpress.com/
Recent publications: (With Sheila E Murphy) Continuations & Continuations 2 (UofAPress).
Recording Dates (Rubicon Press).
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and as you read
the sea is turning its dark pages
turning
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Denise Levertov
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