Well, I'm still in a introspective mood that I find myself getting into during the reflective times of Rosh Hashonah and Yom Kippur. In this instance, a few days ago I was talking with a colleague here at my university who was lamenting that "students are getting in my way" of his potential promotion and tenuring because of the increasingly imposing research and publication requirement that he says currently are being put into place.
"Getting in the way." That's a sad way to put your belief about students and how you see them. And, what is sadder is that belief, that view, that perception,that expectation, whatever you want to call "that," is far more prevalent than most of us want to admit. Classroom teaching is being forced farther and farther back into the background by these "what really matter" scholarship demands, lip service to classroom teaching the contrary notwithstanding.
I warned him, "You're at a dangerous crossroad....You've got to be careful....You've heard that adage, 'seeing is believing.' Don't believe it. It should be 'believing is seeing.' I mean you have to realize that what you believe is not just going to influence, but is going to determine what you see and then how you're going to act?"
"I know that," he answered with a saddened "I really don't want to know that" tone. It was as if he knew his dreams were turning into nightmares, and his excitement into something else.
I continued, "You have to be careful you aren't changing your empathy for students into a frustration." In the course of our brief conversation, he waved me off verbally with a weak, unconvincing, and fearful sounding guarantee, "I won't."
I truly hope he's right, but he has every right to be afraid of keeping his promise to himself. The problem is, as a Hindu saying goes, a person is made of beliefs about her- or himself and others. That means every moment we each paint a portrait of our own lives and of the landscape from a palette of those beliefs in a way that our beliefs are very believable to us; every moment we are convincing ourselves of the validity of our held beliefs; every moment we do everything we can not to challenge our beliefs. The ultimate tragedy, then, is if his belief about students is involuntarily changing, especially if he consciously feels under duress and is being forced to do so, well, then?
So, I ask: Can you admit to yourself what you honestly believe--honestly believe? What are you convincing yourself to believe about yourself? How are you convincing yourself to be? What and whom do you see because of those beliefs? What do you do, then, because of those beliefs? To paraphrase Martin Buber, do you believe unconditionally in every person we label "student?" Do you believe unconditionally that every person we label "student" represents something sacred, noble, and new, something that has never existed before, something original, something unique, something that is a piece of the future? Do you believe it is your mission to help each and every person reach for her or his unique, unprecedented and never-recurring potentialities? Or, as this faculty member, do you believe "students get in the way," especially the so-called lesser ones, in your quest for promotion, tenure, renown?
I have a lot more to say, but for now, I'll leave it at these questions, crossroad questions I felt forced to consciously answer in 1975, crossroads questions to which I started radically changing my answers in 1991.
Make it a good day
-Louis-
Louis Schmier http://www.therandomthoughts.edublogs.org
203 E. Brookwood Pl http://www.therandomthoughts.com
Valdosta, Ga 31602
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