Repetition ('there's no such thing as') sometimes works; as here.
But glad you agree with Lawrence about 'dampens'....
Doug
On 2012-06-20, at 8:41 AM, Lawrence Upton wrote:
> as the goldfish said to the mermaid
>
> L
>
> On Wed, June 20, 2012 16:38, Patrick McManus wrote:
>> Quote or not four waves in three short lines seems a bit much a tad dense
>> methinks?? Cheers P waving waves wavely waves :-)
>>
>>
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: Poetryetc: poetry and poetics [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On
>> Behalf Of Andrew Burke
>> Sent: 20 June 2012 14:48
>> To: [log in to unmask]
>> Subject: Re: snap: wet noodles
>>
>>
>> No, Patrick it is a quote - a pun-ish-meant.
>>
>>
>> Lawrence, y're right: dampens. Thanks.
>>
>>
>> Just a doodle, but I might edit it into what I'm trying to compose for a
>> mag - under poetic pressure.
>>
>>
>> G'night all -
>>
>>
>>
>> Andrew
>>
>>
>> On 20 June 2012 19:54, Patrick McManus
>> <[log in to unmask]>wrote:
>>
>>
>>> Last verse line perhaps could lose a waves?????
>>> Cheers P
>>>
>>>
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: Poetryetc: poetry and poetics [mailto:[log in to unmask]]
>>> On Behalf Of Andrew Burke
>>> Sent: 20 June 2012 11:08
>>> To: [log in to unmask]
>>> Subject: snap: wet noodles
>>>
>>>
>>> rain crescendo dogs crest fallen day gets damp
>>>
>>> a tap drips pianissimo
>>>
>>> cross currents of changing seasons unsettle
>>>
>>> house holds tight to her foundations
>>>
>>> strapped to the deck a German yacht rides the waves
>>>
>>> a gift to a man in middle age
>>>
>>> sound waves light waves 'waves wave without greeting'*
>>>
>>>
>>> - -
>>>
>>>
>>> * jill jones poem
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> Andrew
>>> http://hispirits.blogspot.com/
>>>
>>>
>>
>>
>>
>> --
>> Andrew
>> http://hispirits.blogspot.com/
>>
>>
>
>
> -----
> Lawrence Upton
> Visiting Fellow, Music Dept,
> Goldsmiths, University of London
> New Cross, London SE14 6NW
> ----
>
Douglas Barbour
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http://www.ualberta.ca/~dbarbour/
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