I like the poem. I'm not sure you need the repetition, or that it adds
anything.
----- Original Message -----
From: "andrew burke" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Friday, March 09, 2007 10:24 PM
Subject: poem submitted for comment
> I've been doodling with this poem for the last day and feel unsure of
> its worth, so I proffer it for your consideration.
>
>
> The Cyclist (title)
>
>
> she's been cycling through my mind
> for days now old Chinese lady
> on her dusty rusty bike
>
> with a burnt-out box
> of cardboard fire crackers
> clamped to the rack at the back
>
> she's been cycling through my mind
> on her way to make a few fen
> recycling that cardboard
>
> burnt and smelling of explosions
> to drive away Bad Spirits
> cycling to buy the cold away
>
> she's been cycling through my mind
> for days now days when China
> suffered the worst snow storms in fifty years
>
> --
> Andrew
> http://hispirits.blogspot.com/
>
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