Ah, but Max, isn't that true of a lot of poems? And in subsequent readings
perhaps the 'unshareable' become more 'shareable'? Or am I reading your
comment incorrectly? It was a style of poem I have been thinking about for a
couple of days, but semester has started so I didn't have much time. It is
of 'snap' quality - that is, rushed and only the barebones of a thought
rendered, so I am hoping to get back to it on the weekend and pay it some
serious attention. It could be a worthwhile poem - but I am wornout already
and it is only Thursday <g> I'll attempt a better version on the weekend; in
the meantime, I'd love to hear which was which for you - it could give me a
jumping off point for editing it.
Andrew
On 08/03/07, Max Richards <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>
> Andrew,
>
> I enjoy lots here, but feel it fluctuates between the shareable and the
> unshareable...
>
> best from Max
>
> Quoting andrew burke <[log in to unmask]>:
>
> > I remember her violin on the wall
> >
> > a log rolling out of the fire
> >
> > the Punch'n'Judy show at the fair
> >
> > I remember her playing _Chariots of Fire_
> >
> > the firemen putting out the chimney
> >
> > the Wendy house Santa built in the dark
> >
> > _I don't want to look after the baby!_
> >
> > Disneyworld was a fantasy world on Sunday TV
> >
> > a welcome break from the Viet Nam war
> >
> > smoke rose from the Wendy house
> >
> > as he tried to keep her warm
> >
> > I remember the music teacher in the wheelchair
> >
> > and her tantrum banging the bow against the strings
> >
> > Punch threw the baby into the audience
> >
> > children laughed as the committee froze
> >
> > I was a man paid by the word
> >
> > late at night the pines sang above the tinroof shed
> >
> > the violin hung silent on the wall
> >
> > Punch'n'Judy packed-up and left
> > another log burnt to ashes
> > I wrote videos until dawn
> > then drove to the city
> > to write more
> > not a word I loved
> > for the ones I loved
> >
> > now I remember the Wendy house
> > and _Chariots of Fire_
> > the warmth of fireside evenings
> > poems with coffee at dawn
> > the laughter of children
> > as Punch threw the baby out
> >
>
>
>
>
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------
> This email was sent from Netspace Webmail: http://www.netspace.net.au
>
--
Andrew
http://hispirits.blogspot.com/
http://www.bam.com.au/andrew
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