Why thank you, Frederick, Judy. I assure it was just a doodle - a five
minute scribble.
I've slightly revised it, if of interest. The 'EX' should be in italics.
(I'd never actually seen what a drop-in for the homeless etc is like at
Christmas before this one, just as I'd never seen what the inside of a
psychiatric ward is like either. Been, um, interesting.)
This is the revision:
The Triangle Drop-in Centre
Dossers snigger at an untuned trumpet
And the songs they should sing
For this (lottery funded) EX-mas supper.
Wincing the herald angels
Press hands over ears. Like a brickyard
Abandoned in a holiday,
Boxes stack and tumble at the foot
Of the invisible. Tree not there,
Tree not reaching heavenheadward,
As the wet snow waits,
Dribbling, drizzling, drivelling,
Outside, writing as it slaps your face
Its true name: cold reign.
December 24th 2005
Best
Dave
----- Original Message -----
From: "Frederick Pollack" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Tuesday, December 27, 2005 2:06 PM
Subject: Re: Doodle
> ----- Original Message -----
> From: "David Bircumshaw" <[log in to unmask]>
> To: <[log in to unmask]>
> Sent: Tuesday, December 27, 2005 6:54 AM
> Subject: Doodle
>
>
> The Triangle Drop-in Centre
>
> The dossers snigger at the untuned trumpet
> And the songs they should sing
> For this (lottery funded) Christmas supper.
> Even the herald angels
>
> Press hands over ears. Like a brickyard
> Abandoned in a rush,
> Boxes stack and tumble at the foot
> Of the invisible. Tree not there,
>
> Tree not reaching heavenheadward,
> As the wet snow waits
> Outside, writing as it slaps your face
> Its true name: cold rain.
>
> Considerably more than a "doodle"! "Boxes stack and tumble at the foot /
Of
> the invisible" - excellent!
|