medieval-religion: Scholarly discussions of medieval religion and culture
Dear Marjoree!
Heloisa's dislike for marriage - deduced from Abelard's comment in the
Historia Calamitatum - is a commonplace, often repeated, but without real
evidence.
One should regard the psychological and socio-cultural impact: By using
traditional psychological terms, H.'s and A.'s "drama of marriage" could be
described as a so-called "Aversions-Appetenz-Konflikt" (conflict between
aversion and appetency), for both of them.
As regards Heloisa, her spontaneous joy about pregnancy and getting a baby,
impulsively offered to Abelard by a letter (puella se concepisse comperit et
cum summa exultatione mihi super hoc ilico scripsit...HC), suggest that
Heloisa initially accepted the traditional "career" of a young lady in the
early Middle Ages, who wanted to get her child to be legitimated: marriage,
household etc. Marriage was not impossible or forbidden "a priori", as
Abelard wasn't a prebendary, but only an associated member of the chapter of
Notre-Dame (concanonicus). When Heloisa later rejected marriage, she had got
a very traumatic experience just before:
· Abelard sent the pregnant girl - disguised as a nun - to Le Pallet without
being with her all the time (in patriam meam sine mora transmisi.). So
Heloisa had been alone for many weeks.
· The birth of Astralabe took place in an environment, unknown to H. and
perhaps somehow hostile (H. was nursed by A's sister Denise, but we don't
know the attitude of the rest of A's family).
· When Abelard brought Heloisa back to Paris, he did't produce arguments of
love, concerning the upcoming marriage. His primary and apparently egoistic
argument was that, by this way, he could save his own reputation (ne fame
detrimentum incurrerem).
Now, back to Paris and after a thoroughly reflection of their conditions of
life, Heloise rejected marriage by rational arguments, using patristic and
philosophical sources (Hieronymus, Augustinus, Seneca et al., quoted by
Abelard in his Historia Calamitatum and not contradicted by Heloise in her
letters). By this way, Heloise offered - consciously or unconsciously - all
the arguments to her beloved, which could justify HIS, but not necessarily
her own behaviour. Heloisa's arguments against marriage represent an
excellent kind of "sublimation", giving a solution for the pre-existing,
latent, severe psychic conflict between the partners. I think that Heloise
was fully conscious of the fact that a light-hearted and ambitious man like
Abelard couldn't ever live in a firm relationship, restricted by marriage.
So Heloisa's statement against marriage was realistic, prudent, and helpful
for Abelard., but it didn't necessarily reflect her true feelings. On the
contrary, one may suppose that she was full of desire for a fulfilled
partnership, but she sacrificed her own future for the future of Abelard. By
abhoring marriage, she abhored something which could never get true.
Nevertheless, her standpoint was extraordinary, result of her extant mind,
but perhaps also influenced by heredity or monastical education. (she could
not have been influenced in a positive way by her parents' example, as she
hadn't grown up in the nunnery of Argenteuil, far way from her parents and
her sisters and brothers).
By the way, after a long and intensive research in contemporary documents, I
am convinced that Heloise descends from the Angevine family "de Campania."
Her - supposed - mother Hersendis de Campania was familiar with Raingardis,
the mother of Peter the Venerable. Probably, this was the reason why Peter
the Venerable was very interested in Heloisas fate (= query of Dorothea
Martin). Without intending to use this forum for promotion: All this items
of partnership, marriage, conversion and family connections are discussed in
an upcoming study about Heloisas parentage: Heloisas Herkunft: Hersindis
Mater (being published in Mai 2001; in German). See: www.abaelard.de
I hope this was useful for you.
Kind regards
W. Robl
PS: Apologize my mediocre English.
> Dear List,
>
> Even after reading Gilson, Marenbon and Clanchy, I
> remain anxious for more opinion, comment and
> hypotheses concerning the voluntary separation of the
> pair. It seems that A wanted the marriage and H did
> not. But after the marriage, the roles seem to
> reverse. Any opinion, comment or hypotheses out there?
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