Yes, Andrew of Corowa may be on to something, Max. My comment was only partly about the poem, knowing more context and history I suppose.
Bill
On 13/08/2015, at 2:28 PM, Max Richards wrote:
> thanks for this interesting advice, Andre of Corowa and Cavoodles.
>
> When Bill said ‘such love’
>
> and Doug:
>
> 'noble just to walk yourself up those stairs…’
>
> I sensed I’d angled it badly.
>
> Krupp and kaput
> and the stupid comedy of pet strollers -
> these I wanted to come over.
>
> Max and the two Labs
>
> On Aug 12, 2015, at 21:10, Andrew Burke <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>
>> I love Labradors :-) and my dog is my closest pal! (A Cavoodle.) I
>> understand your devotion and applaud your care.
>>
>> As to the poem, I'd try it as a prose poem. I don't believe it needs
>> versification. If you're working on a 'domestic softcore' manuscript, a
>> prose poem may be a welcome variation to your usual modus operandi ... I do
>> like it but would like the narrative to be centre stage - not the telling
>> of it.
>>
>> Andrew
>> Hermit of Corowa
>>
>>
>> On 13 August 2015 at 08:27, Bill Wootton <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>>
>>> Such love, Max.
>>>
>>> Bill
>>>
>>>> On 13 Aug 2015, at 12:11 am, Max Richards <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>>>>
>>>> The pet stroller came urgently
>>>> in a pack from Amazon -
>>>> where else? I lugged the box
>>>> up three flights of stairs,
>>>> folded out the frame, fitted
>>>>
>>>> three wheels, played like a kid
>>>> with the cute bike-tyre pump.
>>>> I pressed the wrappings
>>>> deep into the carton
>>>> and disposed of it.
>>>>
>>>> Why our need? our Lift
>>>> (by Krupp!) had gone kaput.
>>>> Our post-op Lab was coming
>>>> back from hospital,
>>>> weak and stiff and Not
>>>> to go on stairs, up or down.
>>>>
>>>> First we tried with Pink,
>>>> the younger Lab - do take
>>>> a ride. No way! she squirmed!
>>>> she could tell it was unsafe,
>>>> undignified, unLabrador.
>>>>
>>>> What this in the instructions?
>>>> Do Not Use on Stairs. Shush,
>>>> while the Elevator stays Kaput,
>>>> we have no choice, down or up.
>>>> Bring home the dog - we’ll see.
>>>>
>>>> He came, we sniffed the dead
>>>> elevator door and then the stair.
>>>> Here a strong human should bundle
>>>> the needy creature in his arms,
>>>> carrying him up three flights,
>>>>
>>>> however slowly. We three stared,
>>>> none of us strong, and lifted
>>>> slow feet up one stair, two,
>>>> three...to the first landing.
>>>> That wasn’t too bad!
>>>>
>>>> Take a breather, a few steps,
>>>> another breather. This is OK.
>>>> Along to the flat door, home.
>>>> Rest, everybody, while Pink
>>>> enjoys the overdue reunion.
>>>>
>>>> So convalescence passes,
>>>> each day a little stronger.
>>>> So the elevator firm
>>>> slowly solves its problems.
>>>> Health returns together
>>>>
>>>> in dog and elevator.
>>>> That leaves a smart virgin
>>>> pet-stroller. I wheel it over
>>>> to the apartment office.
>>>> They’d said in this emergency
>>>>
>>>> they’d bear the cost. Park it
>>>> in a corner, I suggest, till
>>>> the next emergency, when
>>>> dogs and humans call:
>>>> we need that stroller now.
>>>
>
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