I'm fine with all of that, Doug; glad you got something out of it!
L
On 11 December 2014 at 18:22, Douglas Barbour <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>
> Ah, well then, it does a fine job as it, although I guess you want those
> words smashed up together to be separated at least?
>
> Bothering about such a small material aspect ames us away from the actual
> words moving along in the piece. And they did a good job. I think you can (
> we can't) force any reader to take exactly what we think they should. I
> ended up fastening onto those two phrases because they seemed to
> demonstrate the general 'mood' of it as I was getting it. Not suggesting
> they are the all omit but rather that they focused my particular reading...
>
> Doug
> On Dec 11, 2014, at 9:57 AM, Lawrence Upton <[log in to unmask]>
> wrote:
>
> > Not necessarily. There's all kinds of things going on. Maybe they didn't
> > work. That'd explain them not being obvious.
> >
> > If you really wanted I could send the text with the line breaks marked
> with
> > a slash...
> >
> > I'd hate to force my poetry. We should all be consenting adults.
> >
> > btw I think I just saw Patrick coming out of someone else's house looking
> > very pleased with himself
> >
> > L
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > On 11 December 2014 at 16:25, Douglas Barbour <[log in to unmask]>
> wrote:
> >
> >> Of curse, Lawrence.
> >>
> >> My fingers apparently wanted a different word than I did, I meant
> >> 'lineation' in my second point... thought the doubled words were where
> line
> >> breaks had been intended...
> >>
> >> Doug
> >> On Dec 11, 2014, at 5:08 AM, Lawrence Upton <[log in to unmask]>
> >> wrote:
> >>
> >>> I don't think that I am in any position to agree or disagree, Doug;
> but I
> >>> wouldn't argue; it sounds reliable.
> >>> I was most concerned with covering a different kind of visual-audio
> >>> situation than I have covered!
> >>>
> >>> On your other point, there is some unexpected ideation there for sure;
> >> but
> >>> I'm not sure that is connected with its being verse or prose. (Bit of
> >> both,
> >>> I suggest.)
> >>>
> >>> best
> >>>
> >>> L
> >>>
> >>> On 10 December 2014 at 17:54, Douglas Barbour <[log in to unmask]>
> >> wrote:
> >>>
> >>>> Our names are transient. & The ground is crumbling. those seem
> central
> >> to
> >>>> my reading Lawrence. How the rest falls off & away from these.
> >>>>
> >>>> I wondered about ideation when I saw some of those words together, but
> >> was
> >>>> more or less reading it as a kind of prose poem. It certainly seems to
> >>>> resonate with the news of these days, but digs into psyches that
> >> generally
> >>>> withhold...
> >>>>
> >>>> Doug
> >>>> On Dec 10, 2014, at 8:03 AM, Lawrence Upton <[log in to unmask]>
> >>>> wrote:
> >>>>
> >>>>> It appears to have played hell with the lineation; but I'm not sure
> >> that
> >>>>> much matters much here. It's extremely loose & prosy
> >>>>>
> >>>>> On 10 December 2014 at 14:43, Sheila Murphy <[log in to unmask]
> >
> >>>> wrote:
> >>>>>
> >>>>>> Lawrence, as I always do, I admire this piece. One thing that I
> >> observed
> >>>>>> further was my own desire to rearrange passages, because this works
> so
> >>>> many
> >>>>>> ways. In fact, moving such passages around reveals different types
> of
> >>>>>> "story" plus perceptive power. I think that speaks to the integrity
> of
> >>>> what
> >>>>>> you have written.
> >>>>>>
> >>>>>> Sheila
> >>>>>>
> >>>>>> On Wed, Dec 10, 2014 at 7:33 AM, Lawrence Upton <
> >>>> [log in to unmask]>
> >>>>>> wrote:
> >>>>>>
> >>>>>>> The street is a dream. Show us the accolade. It isn't mundane.
> >>>>>>> Desirous of worldly freedoms, we're cold. Can you fancy that?
> >>>>>>> At the bar, we're issued with an almanac. Our cloaks are elusivein
> >>>>>>> which we can injure you as non-participant in nightmare.
> >>>>>>> This gallery, you see the place?, is the innermost of which we are
> >>>>>>> the publicists; we are resentful. The obstructionists, that's what
> >>>>>>> they say, are crackers:the crackers obstructionists reign. It's not
> >>>>>>> cranky.
> >>>>>>> The almanac is endless; its peculiarity is dishonesty; and the
> >>>>>>> dishonesty ubiquitous.
> >>>>>>> The street is a dream. It is the quintessence, that is, it is the
> >> core
> >>>>>>> the crux the essence, he said, turning the pages of the folio which
> >>>>>>> encourage us to deviate.
> >>>>>>> He took a sip from his half-full glass.Of what? we asked. I am
> >>>>>>> inclined, he said, to clasp any machination to obtain respite.
> >>>>>>> At the bar, they tend to be frankand each a truant from the truth.
> We
> >>>>>>> usually join in.
> >>>>>>> The cretin sets out to consume the image which gives him or her
> >>>>>>> succour though furtively. What is there?
> >>>>>>> Blood may clot, a beak may enter the outer skinof the weather, and
> we
> >>>>>>> may flunk. We clasp the blockhead secret, the wandering sprite. We
> >>>>>>> clasp and crush, by accident, the coincidental; it's galling he's
> so
> >>>>>>> cocky.
> >>>>>>> Clasp hold of the boom, he says, just listen to it, puzzling over
> the
> >>>>>>> carnal. He is a boor. It's the booze that sends him wayfaring
> >>>>>>> furtively. We watch his decay, giving him a nourishment and
> support.
> >>>>>>> We clasp hold of esprit de corps, he says. What the fuck? What the
> >>>>>>> fuck.
> >>>>>>> I sleep, he says, I plumb the wolf in me. It is meaningless he is
> so
> >>>>>>> cocky. Distribute the bill, he calls, distribute the bill. His
> >>>>>>> identity is his loftiness. We are sorrowful. Christ, it is
> freezing,
> >>>>>>> he shouts, and slowly, word by word.Do not cause me to hurt you,
> you
> >>>>>>> stickler. Our names are transient.
> >>>>>>> We clasp the area of his puzzling, finding it inadequate.The street
> >> is
> >>>> a
> >>>>>>> dream?
> >>>>>>> The bricks are ardent. What is that? The sky lightweight; stop
> >>>>>>> commenting, there's no need to explain. The vine cannot grow here.
> >>>>>>> There is no community. We are dependent, he says, on inferior
> trivia.
> >>>>>>> The dignitary has no substance and his journey is nearly worthless.
> >>>>>>> The houses band to gossip. This makes it peaceful and not at all
> >>>>>>> emotional. In one eye, just below it, a tear, or perhaps a fold of
> >> the
> >>>>>>> supposed reality. Do not belittle the pot belly. Do not be
> >>>>>>> belligerent. Cross the bridge. And deign to the confusion. The
> world
> >>>>>>> of fairy is hypothetical.The fraud is okayish.
> >>>>>>> coquette - book - crush - ecstasy - come together
> >>>>>>> apprehension - conference - exclusive - bawdy --absent - animal -
> >>>>>>> active --come together
> >>>>>>> The pavement is an augury, outrage of reason, cold-hearted,
> >> impossible
> >>>>>>> inferno, booze, smooth visions of the edge in direct inoperative
> >>>>>>> botching.The ground is crumbling.
> >>>>>>>
> >>>>>>
> >>>>>
> >>>>
> >>>> Douglas Barbour
> >>>> [log in to unmask]
> >>>>
> >>>> Recent publications: (With Sheila E Murphy) Continuations &
> >> Continuation 2
> >>>> (UofAPress).
> >>>> Recording Dates (Rubicon Press).
> >>>>
> >>>> that we are only
> >>>> as we find out we are
> >>>>
> >>>> Charles Olson
> >>>>
> >>>
> >>
> >> Douglas Barbour
> >> [log in to unmask]
> >>
> >> Recent publications: (With Sheila E Murphy) Continuations &
> Continuation 2
> >> (UofAPress).
> >> Recording Dates (Rubicon Press).
> >>
> >> that we are only
> >> as we find out we are
> >>
> >> Charles Olson
> >>
> >
>
> Douglas Barbour
> [log in to unmask]
>
> Recent publications: (With Sheila E Murphy) Continuations & Continuation 2
> (UofAPress).
> Recording Dates (Rubicon Press).
>
> that we are only
> as we find out we are
>
> Charles Olson
>
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