Hi Doug
I didn't get Bill's, so I'll work from the copy in yours. (Later, it
did come through but wasn't onforwarded to my “workhorse email”
where I was reading. It is here on this email
Start again
Hi Bill, Doug, Patrick
>Except for the hedges (which imply some keptness), this could be an
Australian pre-bushfire piece, Lawrence.
Aha. Interesting. Coincidental. It's Somerset. Soggy Somerset.
>Is there a reason all lines but the first are indented one letter
space?
No. I shall examine my sent copy. The word processed version is
standard.
>And is the switch to present tense in the fifth line deliberate?
Well, it isn't a switch to present tense. One tends to say
“understood” in such circumstances, yes, well, we do, and
obviously you lot do; but it is ok like that I believe.
As it happens: I understand. Now: I understand. ie nothing has
changed Thus, as it happened, I could say I understand; and then I
could refer to that in the past without changing the tense to agree
with it. It becomes clear if you put speech marks round “I
understand”; but that isn't necessary. I really wanted that odd
'call' to the present tense, against the demotic use of tense, to pin
down / picture the force of the images
>I like 'That's many yards' which tells well of movement when your
eyes want arrest.
Good. I'm pleased. I wrote that almost immediately and then
worried... Glastonbury was far behind before I turned the page – and
it never was near thank the vacuum
Thanks for the interest
Doug
>I thought 'train,' even as the poem says 'drove,' Lawrence, that
speed of passing the bush.
I know what you mean. It was a coach, London - Penzance via Falmouth.
Going fast as we neared the coffee break
> Not sure what 'fire hills' are, although those men could be read as
firefighter after a fire (at a farm?)…
I'm not sure what they are... I was just now coming back into London
and looking at all the distortions and reflections in the window and
thinking there might be a film there... Odd effects of being in a
coach; only the driver sees clearly.
I doubt they were firefighters or that there was a fire, though it's
a nice idea.
Indirect sunlight most like
In a back-channel exchange here (near here!) some time ago, I said
that I have seen a ghost and have no belief in them. It's what I saw.
Hills of fire if you like. The brain making sense of what it sees and
getting it wrong with distortion and reflection and unwanted light.
All a matter of seconds but grabbed and written fairly truthfully
> It's a true series of quick snapshots, though...
Patrick. Er... I have misjudged Raynes Park
L
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