Lovely poem Doug -
I especially like "what used / to be east germany"
To my mind it would feel unbalanced and unfinished without the 3 long beats (a molossus!) of the final line.
Brian
--- On Thu, 1/10/09, Douglas Barbour <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
From: Douglas Barbour <[log in to unmask]>
Subject: memory snap
To: [log in to unmask]
Received: Thursday, 1 October, 2009, 6:14 AM
that voice ethereal
soaring wafted
into elevator
rising in some
small hotel in
some small city
in what used
to be east germany
constant & craving
we rise too
[sometimes a lyric (nostalgia) just hits one)
I enjoyed the other snaps today, all those short shots....
Douglas Barbour
[log in to unmask]
http://www.ualberta.ca/~dbarbour/
Latest books:
Continuations (with Sheila E Murphy)
http://www.uap.ualberta.ca/UAP.asp?LID=41&bookID=664
Wednesdays'
http://abovegroundpress.blogspot.com/2008/03/new-from-aboveground-press_10.html
Take away my wisdom and my categories!
Phyllis Webb
__________________________________________________________________________________
Get more done like never before with Yahoo!7 Mail.
Learn more: http://au.overview.mail.yahoo.com/
|