Thank you to everyone that has responded to this poem. It doesn't come from one memory of a 'you' so I'm really pleased that some felt that it invites the reader to explore their own experiences. This wasn't my intention at all though! I was trying to write a(nother) poem about the ruins of the old Coventry Cathedral when I was unexpectedly overwhelmed by several blasts from my past. I needed to write something quickly to get them out of my system - to scratch them out. This was the result.
I also didn't intend the intro line to be read as part of the poem but I've thought about it a lot today and for several reasons I think that it works.
I appreciate the feedback very much.
Tina
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> Date: Sat, 7 Mar 2009 17:37:30 +0000
> From: [log in to unmask]
> Subject: Re: My slow snap - Bass (slight amendment)
> To: [log in to unmask]
>
> I find tis poem very moving upsetting tense painful
> Old P crying
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Poetryetc: poetry and poetics [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On
> Behalf Of Tina Bass
> Sent: 06 March 2009 23:59
> To: [log in to unmask]
> Subject: Re: My slow snap - Bass (slight amendment)
>
> > and when you say 'it's fine'
> >
> > it's fine in the way that
> >
> > all your decisions are fine
> >
> >
> >
> > and I bow my head as you leave
> >
> >
> >
> > when you say 'fine'
> >
> > I repeat, 'fine' over and over
> >
> > until my mantra
> >
> >
> >
> > starts picking up pieces
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > puts them together
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> > --------------------------------------------------------------
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