I don't have any solution to this, but if memory serves Blackburn
treats it somewhat differently in his translation of the Poem of the
Cid, which I don't have handy. If anybody does, how about a sample of
the dialogue?
In all older literature there's the question of what one's trying to
provide the reader in the target language, an experience similar to
that of a modern speaker of the source language, or something more
like what the original audience would have experienced, i.e., without
the moss of time draped over it. Alison mostly goes for the latter,
which would be my choice, and I think she does a pretty good job with
the dialogue, which is not so much dialogue as proclamation. With
epic especially there's also the problem that there's no modern
equivalent available.
I do think that unless one is preparing a line by line trot a bit of
trimming of redundancies that made sense in the original cultural
context and the music of the original is ok to do. Retaining a few
would do the trick--a little suggestion goes a long way.
To a lesser extent this is a problem with any translation.
Grammatical norms in other languages, if reproduced in English, often
seem awkward and overdone.
Here's my revision of V, with absolutely no reference to the
original. Alison, don't pay much attention to this--it's the kind of
thing one shouldn't bother with until a later go-over. And don't take
it amiss--I'm enjoying your version, but fiddling with translations
is an almost irresistable translator's obsession.
The stone-paved street guided them
their mail harsh in the pale light,
the ring-iron glittering, and they sang
as they marched to the high hall.
Sea-weary, they lay their wide
war-bossed shields against the wall
and sat, in the raiment of warriors,
corslets ringing, amid a forest of spears,
the weapon of sea-farers,
silver tipping a grove of ash.
A warrior asked them: "Why
do you carry plated shields
and sea-grey armour, masked helmets
and this host of spears?
I am Hrothgar's herald and officer
and I have never seen such brave strangers
enter these halls from a far country.
Valour surely, not exile, brings you:
greatness of heart here seeks out Hrothgar."
The proud prince of the Geats
answered, "We are Hygelac's
feasting companions. My name
is Beowulf. I wish to tell my errand
to your lord, if he
permit us to his presence."
Wulfgar spoke, the Wendel's leader,
known among men for war-skill and wisdom.
"I will ask the Lord of the Danes,
giver of rings, friend of the Scyldings,
and tell you his answer."
Strode he quickly
to grey-haired Hrothgar, throned among earls,
and stood by his shoulder. He knew the customs
of courtiers. "These men have ventured
over the sea, from the land of the Geats.
Their leader is Beowulf. They desire
to speak with you. Do not refuse them,
gracious Hrothgar; their war-gear shows
that they are nobles, men to respect,
and their prince a mighty warrior."
At 08:43 PM 11/27/2008, you wrote:
>Hey David,
>
>Haven't you noticed that they talk like this in *The Iliad*,
>*The Odyssey*, and *The Aeneid*--not to mention most of Ancient
>Greek drama? 'Tis the style, LAD, and *Beowulf* is actually
>refreshingly direct in its <direct speech>, to use the
>narratological term. So lay off Alison, will ya? She's doing a fine job.
>
>Candice
>
>
>
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