Like Ole Mole (I think it was), I don't go a bundle on "harbinger". Yeah,
K, "bringer" works better . . . unless Sharon can come up with a sub word or
line. But I love the packed power of all the rest, wouldnae change a bit.
Keep us well supplied with your poems, Sharon---of any kind.
Best,
Judy
----- Original Message -----
From: "kasper salonen" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Monday, April 21, 2008 8:38 AM
Subject: Re: Pink Moon
> yes, how about 'bringer of spring'?
> an article before 'crow', since you have one before all the other nouns?
> the end is a little bland, I got a sort of minor 'so what' reaction.
> there's a drama that needn't be there, it undermines the imagery I
> think.
>
> another great moon-poem though. I dug immensely
>
> KS
>
> On 20/04/2008, sharon brogan <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>> Pink Moon, Egg Moon,
>> you bring snow
>> and crow complaining
>> from the spruce tree.
>> You bury the crocus.
>> You bend the trees down.
>> Grass Moon, Fish Moon,
>> harbinger of spring,
>> why are you so cold?
>>
>>
>> --
>>
>>
>> ~ SB | http://www.sbpoet.com | =^..^=
>>
>
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