You could try doing both. Cut-up your own poetry, see if the results
are worth keeping. I've found that this helps to stop me being
precious being my poems[1]. Or maybe it's just me with the desperation
here ...
Roger
[1] A friend of mine told me that if she suspected that one of her
pupils was being precious about their work, then she'd take the
red-pen to it pronto! Eeek!
On 5/31/07, kasper salonen <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> hoorah for semantics. I didn't mean nice sounds (the sonics are quite
> unremarkable), I just liked the word/image combinations of the second
> stanza somewhat.
> it's just that sounding nice is rarely enough, even if it sounds
> REALLY nice, which this didn't. phrases like "casualties of elegant
> madness" annoy me (not to mention "lines of unlimited want") because
> they don't seem to refer to anything, or refer to something way
> abstract, and sound interesting on one hand but inane on the other. it
> reminds me of the type of poetry teenage writers tend to come up with.
>
> the cutting-up is the basis here, sure. the technique is alien to me
> as an idea (I like to come up with my own words; not to say that
> 'collage' poetry must necessarily be crap), maybe that has something
> to do with it.
>
> KS
>
> On 31/05/07, Halvard Johnson <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> > Seems contradictory, KS. You got nice sounds
> > out of it.
> >
> > Hal
> >
> > "I would horsewhip you if I had a horse."
> > --Groucho Marx
> >
> > Halvard Johnson
> > ================
> > [log in to unmask]
> > [log in to unmask]
> > http://home.earthlink.net/~halvard
> > http://entropyandme.blogspot.com
> > http://imageswithoutwords.blogspot.com
> > http://www.hamiltonstone.org
> >
> > On May 31, 2007, at 1:11 AM, kasper salonen wrote:
> >
> > > this makes no sense to me. sounds kind of nice, but I get nothing
> > > out of it.
> > >
> > > KS
> > >
> > > On 31/05/07, Tina Bass <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> > >> I think I prefer it like this, without the original first line.
> > >> Comments
> > >> welcome. I'm quite tired. I may think differently tomorrow.
> > >>
> > >>
> > >>
> > >>
> > >> lines of unlimited want cross
> > >> casualties of elegant madness
> > >>
> > >> we watch for life as never before
> > >> work out distress in golden clover
> > >> treasure our remote-controlled triumph
> > >>
> > >>
> > >> --------------------------------------------------------------
> > >> [log in to unmask]
> > >> http://www.fatmandancing.co.uk
> > >> http://www.myspace.com/fat_man_dancing
> > >>
> >
>
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"Patriotism is a virtue of the vicious." Oscar Wilde
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