http://www.cs.rice.edu/~ssiyer/minstrels/poems/572.html
There will be no more cats.
Cats spread infection,
Cats pollute the air,
Cats consume seven times
their own weight in food a week,
Cats were worshipped in
decadent societies (Egypt
and Ancient Rome); the Greeks
had no use for cats. Cats
sit down to pee (our scientists
have proved it). The copulation
of cats is harrowing; they
are unbearably fond of the moon.
Perhaps they are all right in
their own country but their
traditions are alien to ours.
Cats smell, they can't help it,
you notice it going upstairs.
Cats watch too much television,
they can sleep through storms,
they stabbed us in the back
last time. There have never been
any great artists who were cats.
They don't deserve a capital C
except at the beginning of a sentence.
I blame my headaches and my
plants dying on cats.
Our district is full of them,
property values are falling.
When I dream of God I see
a Massacre of Cats. Why
should they insist on their own
language and religion, who
needs to purr to make his point?
Death to all cats! The Rule
of Dogs shall last a thousand years!
-- Peter Porter
I think there actually was a Massacre of Cats in France ... see
http://www.amazon.co.uk/Great-Massacre-Penguin-Classic-History/dp/0141390808/sr=8-5/qid=1165417258/ref=sr_1_5/202-2082874-7742227?ie=UTF8&s=books
On 12/6/06, andrew burke <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> Jim - Do you know Peter Porter's poem against cats - Mort Aux Chats,
> or somesuch? (I write from memory, without the benefit of much French,
> so forgive any howlers.)
>
> If'n you don't know it, some body may like to put it forward for you:
> I'm a long way from my complete library.
>
>
> Andrew
>
>
> On 06/12/06, Roger Day <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> > uh-uh. Nods head and scratches beard appreiciatively.
> >
> > http://www.badstep.net/text/poetry/winter/catweatherhouse.html
> >
> > On 12/6/06, Jim Bennett <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> > > This is just to assuage my anger over a nights lost sleep...
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > I have never written
> > > about cats
> > >
> > > and I never will
> > >
> > > the fur ball puke
> > > nigh time baby cries
> > > the cat lit trays
> > > so beloved of
> > > owners who have no
> > > sense of smell
> > > and no one ever owns
> > > a cat anyway
> > > they just live with you
> > > rut and scream
> > > and last night every cat
> > > in Wallasey decided
> > > to fornicate, fight and scream
> > > outside my house
> > >
> > > so I have never written
> > > about cats
> > > and I never will
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Jim
> > > http://www.poetrykit.org/jim/index.htm
> > > www.poetrykit.org
> > > ___________________________________________________
> > >
> >
> >
> > --
> > http://www.badstep.net/
> > "Hello Cleveland! Hello Cleveland!"
> >
>
>
> --
> Andrew
> http://hispirits.blogspot.com/
> http://www.bam.com.au/andrew
>
--
http://www.badstep.net/
"Hello Cleveland! Hello Cleveland!"
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