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Subject:

Re: Fw: Birth fears URGENT HELP REQUIRED

From:

Janet Taiatini <[log in to unmask]>

Reply-To:

A forum for discussion on midwifery and reproductive health research." <[log in to unmask]>

Date:

Fri, 19 Jan 2001 18:01:16 -0800

Content-Type:

text/plain

Parts/Attachments:

Parts/Attachments

text/plain (111 lines)

Kia Ora Ishbel
I am writing from New Zealand.  I do not know the
health services that exist in the area that this woman
is calling from.  One thing that I think is very
important is the relationship she has with her
husband.  It is good that she has achieved pregnancy
given the circumstances.  From your email I am unaware
of the state of her relationship with her husband.  I
believe she needs to be in contact with very
supportive people throughout her pregnancy and life.
I would find professional counselling that does help
the situation.  I suspect there are other issues and
not only the labour, vaginal examinations and being
exposed.
I am also sure there are midwives, possibly male, whom
could keep vaginal exams to the minimum, if at all. I
believe a trusting relationship with the professional
persons in this pregnancy are paramount.
I believe that caesarian section is an option as a
last resort, due to the risks that she may  face.
End of the day this woman needs spiritual guidance in
the form of Christian life.  She can be healed.  I
cannot recommend any Christian counsellors or
Christian church groups outside the North Island New
Zealand that could help.  I will pray for this
situation.  God Bless and Good Luck. Janet.
--- Ishbel Kargar <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> Dear ListSisters
>
> This is a very sensitive posting, and I am sure
> there are many Listners out
> there who can offer help.  However, to preserve
> confidentiality, I have
> deleted the identifying details from the message.
> Please will you try to
> help this woman in any way you can by responding to
> her request via the ARM
> email address.  I will pass on your messages as soon
> as they come through.
>
> Many thanks
> Ishbel
>
> To: <[log in to unmask]>
> Sent: 18 January 2001 22:10
> Subject: Birth fears
>
>
> To whom it may concern
>
> I am 25 years old and 21weeks pregnant.  I am having
> trouble getting
> information and support regarding my problem.  I was
> wondering if you can
> help?
>
> I have psycho-sexual problems which I have had
> counselling for,
> unfortunately this did not help and if anything has
> made the problem worse.
> This stems from being abused by a female family
> member and a difficult
> childhood.
>
> The problem I have is the prospect of a vaginal
> birth.  I have great fears
> of actually giving birth, but also the prospect of
> having internal
> examinations and being exposed.  I have spoke to my
> midwife who did not
> offer much support and I have had an appointment
> with my obstetrician who
> suggests that a caesarean section is my best option.
>  I am worried if I go
> through a natural birth it will affect my
> relationship with my baby (I fear
> I will resent it and reject it).  I also worry it
> will greatly affect my
> relationship with my husband who has always been
> very supportive.  The
> obstetrician feels it will be better emotionally for
> myself and the baby.
>
> I feel that the best option is a caesarean but am
> obvioulsy concerned that
> it is a major operation and it will take longer to
> recover from.  I am
> confused as to whether this way is better than if I
> have the baby naturally
> and go through psychological problems post-nataly.
> I would greatly
> appreciate your advice on this matter and any
> information you can give me
> about cases like mine and also positive information
> about caesarean sections
> (as all I can find is negative things!)
>
> Thank you very much for your help in this matter.  I
> do hope you can help me
> and I look forward to hearing from you.
>
> Regards
>
> C.R.


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