I've played pro ball on *3* continents--most recently in Venezuela for the
Maracaibo Imberbes (or "beardless ones"). I pitch, but since I can only
bring the ball to the plate at 80 mph tops, I've always had to rely on junk
pitches. Here are a few: Drunkard's Fancy, Hole-in-the-Bucket, King of the
Hill, the Simplified Step-Away-Lively, the Advanced Step-Away-Lively,
Sissie's Powder Puff, Shortstop's Delight, the Rare Back and Letter Rip, and
the Snaky Shaker. Basically, with my arsenal, the batter marches to the
plate whistling a tune, & slunks back cussin a blue streak
--Jacques
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