John Homan wrote: > Thanks Judy, > > there is an old saying that friends come and go, but enemies are forever. > > Adapting this to our lives: therapists and social workers come and go, only > write their phone numbers in the teledex in pencil, but > parents/families/carers are here forever, or until they drop dead (whatever > happens first) When the chips are down we are their advocates, their > strength, and life support; day in year out. We are also a vastly exploited > resource, inhibited from fighting back dirty because we love our children, > and are apalled by the idea of making spectacle out of what is a tragedy. > I'll refrain for analyzing the quip about your life being a tragedy because of someone else's existence. However, John, to point out what should be fairly obvious and not to critique your personal situation, your comment suggests that ALL parents/families/carers are, as you believe yourself to be -- an advocate, strength, life support. Considering some fairly recent studies done by, I believe, Berkeley -- over half of Disabled adults who grew up with a disability reported having been physically and or sexually abused as a child by a parent, family member or carer (not to mention the numbers of Disabled children who are killed by their parents, family members, and carers before they reach adulthood -- Drake), I think it is fair to say that at least some of the people who believe themselves to be advocates, strength and life support for their Disabled child are abusers as well. To adapt the saying, "friends come and go, but enemies are forever:" For some, the adaptation is quite easy -- the parents/families/carers are the "enemies" and they are, unfortunately, forever. -- Carolyn check out, "Passing, Invisibility and Other Psychotic Stuff" at http://www.tell-us-your-story.com/_disc68r/00000003.htm Add your story at http://www.tell-us-your-story.com Finding What We Have In Common One Story At A Time* %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%