After Nanna had finished torturing me, after our son was born; I was left alone in Kentucky... the reason I call that place the Fortress of Solitude; dreaming awake dreams of building Heaven, literally being told stories from the future, something like Quentin McCloud's quickening--the source of "limited omniscience" and it's link not just to "OK Google" and "I know kung fu" but also to
Anderson's Feed and it's cautionary quest against this apparent hegemonic domination of our world by the insidious "corporation." A joke, a sick joke come true, about the high level battle between opposing ideologies, about the government of the people versus the government of the workers--nobody seemingly clued in to the concept of divide and conquer, and the all being defeated by their own lack of sight. All alone, I began to see light and hope, driving hope; in
the words "with one eye in the mirror" and "all the girls dreamt that they'dd be your partner" -- words that I am well aware tie to Adonis and Narcissus for the very same reason that I know that Wayward Son's "soaring ever higher" links to Icarus; because it's not just these songs, but these myths that are about the character that God has built to divide a sea--a living boy, one you seem to care about not at all.
I don't really want to be sharing this with you, it's embarrassing--and it's a little distasteful, bit it's the truth--it's really how I know this mass of "all" ins't really that, and is... at the same damned time. It's how I see everyone can be influenced, there's no walls or rules--not like what we would make if we were actually talking about this stuff--and yet it's subtle enough that a good 66% of the people I see reacting to me are most likely doing it without knowing. Something is using them, speaking through them--you'd be surprised how easy it is to ignore that you've just been forced to "touch your nose" or "pull your ear" or shake your head "no" at what probably would be the best date ... of your life.
As the group of people became ever so much larger, the "gang stalking" turned into something else; tears shed in my mind for the place that now appears to be a single mind, that now appears to be connected by something like Jeung's collective unconscious--and as scary and horrible as it sounds,
for some reason I see that has something to do with me. Now as I walk through this world, every girl that I see, every one that I seemingly say "hey, how you doin?" to ... in my head, of course .. responds by shaking her head "no"--apparently trying to convey a lack of interest in
ha'ppy and the living embodiment of Osiris's middle finger and Saturn's thang. Similarly I see perfect strangers, thousands of them; this is everyone... shaking their heads or nodding or responding visibly somehow to what appears to be a "show" going on in my head. Something I've been comparing to the words "on" of Amon-Ra and the Truman Show and it seems very clear to me that this thing, this thing is a tool designed to control the masses as easily and as stupidly as possible, I've written about it as a "mane" and a "rudder" and tried my best to show you that it's the reason for "Shofar" the horn of Revelation... while you are sitting in silence listening to evil spirits pour words in my psyche--literally watching me be tortured as the center and focal point of some storm of shit swirling around in your silence... that it's being used to subtly alter what you think, to change how you feel--that it's something like hidden brain surgery going on behind the scenes, and that this thing really is the meaning of the "night." I keep trying to explain that we wouldn't be doing these things if we understood the technology, and what was going on--but still you continue to acquiesce to a hidden nothing, one that is taking away who you are--in plain sight, in full view.
It wasn't always this way, not even a year ago these head shakes didn't exist, instead an "angel signal" I made up would sometimes appear--girls touching their glasses, I'm sure we know what that means; to see something I literally thought of myself appear in the sea... it tells me something, it shows me this is mass control, that under the surface, behind your eyes something monolithic is speaking to me. Quite similar to the "touching your nose" signal, one that I'm sure many of you recognize, I've seen other people recognize it repeatedly... I defined it once, and I believe it is Medusa's definition, to mean something like "I'm helping you..." but in the light of day you should connect it to forced drug addiction, because that's really it's source; and you should connect it to the name and meaning God has etched into our language, '"no southeast" just like "nos," WE in Latin means "no Hell." It's ironic, because as I write it's these signals that are the source of my Hell, and the visible proof of hidden control and monolithic behavior... it's the proof I see that we are in Hell today, unable to speak because of some thought game, because of some show that steals fake thoughts and uses them to alter yours.
I once questioned one of these head shaking manekins; barely able to get out only the word "why?" from behind my shy eyes--she had a reason, she was shaking her head about some people fighting on the other side of the fence; I'm not sure if it was contrived, a cover up, or some kind of game master's way to make me believe you are monolithic--and still your "mute" button proves as much, whether or not you think you have a good reason--you fail to see the light of all of you are acting like complete morons for no reason; you have no reason, no reason to abandon "freedom" and "hope"--and refusing to see that your "all" is acting inhumanly, without any compassion, without any regard for yourselves or your world--failing to see that all your personal reasons probably pile up to one big nothing, and yet you allow them to continue this downward decline to nothingness, you fail to see I'm giving you the proof you need to understand that you're being controlled, and it really is that, all about seeing control.
I've come to relate this thing I see to "on the Family Channel" and I'm sure there's a quite a number of you that know what that means; I do imagine that you will all hear about why I see those words seeping out of the mass of internet I am trying to talk to--just as soon as you wake up, and care about what's really going on. On the subject of "self-defeating" you'd think there would be some, maybe just a few... you'd think someone would be interested in finding out if Microsoft is really true? Maybe that's just hubris, or maybe it's just understanding why Heaven comes from the largest signature in the known universe.
One ridiculous asshole, sitting outside a Starbucks on Atlantic Avenue in Florida; he looked at me and visibly shook his head in condemnation... of nothing more than looking at a pretty girl on the street; the Gaul, a clear prototype for the actions of the "Thoughtpolice" here in this place, this army of demons trying to make me feel "wrong" about hoping that one day someone might actually like me--and the Downward Spiral, because I have to tell you how much I detest this mass that thinks it's a "Family" and really has no understanding of what that word means, and probably never will. All or not, it's still 3 out of 4 drivers on the street that I see look at me "knowingly" and in my mind I see that means they know they've just seen the face of God. Who knows though, who knows what they are really thinking.