Ah, my ear missed the missing commas, Patrick.
I was hearing an objective third person; you were speaking a subjective first...
Doug
On Jan 15, 2014, at 11:27 AM, Patrick McManus <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> Yup Douglas thanks I did realise that -I was just suggesting a slight
> improvement!!of
> when -he dear
> sorry for confusion
> P deconfusing (hopefully!!)
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Poetryetc: poetry and poetics [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On
> Behalf Of Douglas Barbour
> Sent: 15 January 2014 18:14
> To: [log in to unmask]
> Subject: Re: pat snaps 610 _->^<-_
>
> First line of yr poem, P.
>
> D
> On Jan 15, 2014, at 11:07 AM, Patrick McManus
> <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>
>> Thanks Douglas cheer P when -he dear ??
>>
>> -----Original Message-----
>> From: Poetryetc: poetry and poetics [mailto:[log in to unmask]]
>> On Behalf Of Douglas Barbour
>> Sent: 15 January 2014 17:44
>> To: [log in to unmask]
>> Subject: Re: pat snaps 610 _->^<-_
>>
>> 'questioning' can stay or go, depending, i guess.
>>
>> But 'when he dear' ?
>>
>> Always get a return ticket, though...
>>
>> Doug
>> On Jan 15, 2014, at 4:13 AM, Patrick McManus
>> <[log in to unmask]>
>> wrote:
>>
>>> Hi Bill hot out your way!!
>>> cheers thanks for comment much appreciated rather liked the
>>> questioning pause pointing out as part of their confusion -will reread!!
>>> Once again some else has got my snap but it has not arrived here to
>>> the great sadness of an elderly person
>>>
>>> -----Original Message-----
>>> From: Poetryetc: poetry and poetics [mailto:[log in to unmask]]
>>> On Behalf Of Bill Wootton
>>> Sent: 15 January 2014 11:04
>>> To: [log in to unmask]
>>> Subject: Re: pat snaps 610 _->^<-_
>>>
>>> Pat you could leave out the word/line 'questioning' and do no damage
>>> to the poem. Not sure how much damage granddad suffered.
>>>
>>> Bill
>>>
>>>> On 15 Jan 2014, at 9:27 pm, Patrick McManus
>>> <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>>>>
>>>> TRIP
>>>>
>>>> when he dear
>>>> old granddad
>>>> booked a trip
>>>> to Switzerland
>>>> to Dignitas
>>>> nobody
>>>> in the family
>>>> felt up to
>>>> questioning
>>>> pointing out
>>>> that he had
>>>> bought a
>>>> return ticket
>>>>
>>>>
>>>> pmcmanus
>>>> r433
>>>> Wednesday, 15 January 2014
>>>>
>>>
>>
>> Douglas Barbour
>> [log in to unmask]
>>
>> http://www.ualberta.ca/~dbarbour/
>> http://eclecticruckus.wordpress.com/
>>
>> Latest books:
>> Continuations & Continuations 2 (with Sheila E Murphy)
>> http://www.uap.ualberta.ca/UAP.asp?LID=41&bookID=962
>> Recording Dates
>> (Rubicon Press)
>>
>> Swept snow, Li Po,
>> by dawn's 40-watt moon
>> to the road that hies to office
>> away from home.
>>
>> Lorine Niedecker
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>
> Douglas Barbour
> [log in to unmask]
>
> http://www.ualberta.ca/~dbarbour/
> http://eclecticruckus.wordpress.com/
>
> Latest books:
> Continuations & Continuations 2 (with Sheila E Murphy)
> http://www.uap.ualberta.ca/UAP.asp?LID=41&bookID=962
> Recording Dates
> (Rubicon Press)
>
> Swept snow, Li Po,
> by dawn's 40-watt moon
> to the road that hies to office
> away from home.
>
> Lorine Niedecker
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
Douglas Barbour
[log in to unmask]
http://www.ualberta.ca/~dbarbour/
http://eclecticruckus.wordpress.com/
Latest books:
Continuations & Continuations 2 (with Sheila E Murphy)
http://www.uap.ualberta.ca/UAP.asp?LID=41&bookID=962
Recording Dates
(Rubicon Press)
Swept snow, Li Po,
by dawn’s 40-watt moon
to the road that hies to office
away from home.
Lorine Niedecker
