 |
 |
I doubt that many women had much say in it I doubt if either party had much say in it. Do as I say, marry whom I say -- I have already done a deal -- ot it will be the worse for you. L On Fri, May 11, 2012 18:51, Patrick McManus wrote: > Re marriage over here it seems to be a contract which protects the > partner on smallest income -and usually the women have less income and > more likely to be left holding babies > > I thought before the church got involved (to control people?) being > together was by just I consent earlier I understand -wasn't it all to do > with buying and selling goods in the middle ages?? > > > -----Original Message----- > From: Poetryetc: poetry and poetics [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On > Behalf Of Lawrence Upton > Sent: 11 May 2012 14:58 > To: [log in to unmask] > Subject: Re: post-budget snap > > > Hallo > > >> Lawrence, I don't tell people not to marry. I don't tell people to do >> anything, really - except social controls like drive on the left, stop at >> red traffic lights, don't drink and drive, etc. But even these change >> from jurisdiction to jurisdiction. > > I am considering telling someone to stop saying sssh and spend their time > instead on making their children less inclined to scream; but I see they > are going now.... > > I didn't think you did say that... > > > I too was just talking > > >> Just talking, really. Marriage is such a can full of worms. Yes, we >> should treat people equally - but when's that happened in history on any >> level - social, financial, politically. I'm no expert on Europe's rules >> at all, so is there any society today where the citizens are close > to equal? >> None in >> Aisa, for sure. >> > > Some more than others. The Scandinavian countries beat UK hands down on > women's rights. I think. > > I think. I remember Alaric Sumner telling me that I hadnt really got a > hope in hell of knowing anything in this area, because I wouldn't pick > _it_up, > male, hetero, not yet on the breadline > > Certainly just being with him in public taught me quite a bit about > direct and covert abuse. His experience was really very different to mine. > His > point was that I was largely invisible if I wanted to be. He rarely was. > > A minor life-changing experience. > > > On your other point... It's not so much if it ever happened before as > whether we should behave as though it might. > > I have no desire to get married; but I doubt it would worry me greatly if > someone proposed it -- and if I welcomed the broad thrust (if you'll > pardon the expression) of the proposal. > > I'd probably ask if she really wanted marriage. If I felt I couldn't > easily ask that, it might be an indication that the relationship could be > a mistake. I am quite good at relationships that are mistakes and am > settling more and more for relationships of convenience > > Years ago I said to my boss I might wobble a bit for a bit because a > relationship was breaking up; and she suggested, based on her experience, > that I consider holding it together if I could: "there's a lot to be said > for boredom and regular sex, Lawrence". Stuck in my head. We hadn't had > a conversation like that before. > > but of course you can just shack up and get boredom and regular sex. Or > not. > > I, however, have inclined more and more to the separate establishment > approach > > L > > > > > > >> >> >> As some Hollywood star used to say, *I loves youse all!* I like to >> believe poets are equal ... >> >> >> Andrew >> >> >> >> On 11 May 2012 20:59, Jill Jones <[log in to unmask]> wrote: >> >> >> >>> So far as I'm concerned, it's about having the choice. You can chose >>> or not. But if you don't have access to the same choices as other >>> citizens do then you are not being treated equally. That's the point >>> of all this. Surely. >>> >>> >>> I have been married too. I may or may not wish to go there again. >>> It's fine to be cynical but that's not the point. It is about having >>> the choice, as all heterosexual citizens do and non-heteros don't, in >>> Australia. >>> >>> >>> >>> It is a political act, potentially. >>> >>> >>> >>> J >>> >>> >>> >>> >>> On 11/05/2012, at 8:13 PM, Lawrence Upton wrote: >>> >>> >>> >>>> but you don't want to stop people marrying, do you? >>>> >>>> L >>>> >>>> >>>> >>>> On Fri, May 11, 2012 12:41, Chris Jones wrote: >>>> >>>> >>>>> On 11/05/12 17:25, Andrew Burke wrote: >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> >>>>>> I cannot understand why people want to expand the incidence of >>>>>> marriage. >>>>> I suspect this is the real reason our PM does not support gay >>>>> >>>>> >>> marriage??? >>>>> >>>>> >>>>> for my own self, I am opposed to marriage... gay or straight... >>>>> >>>>> but then perhaps I am an old fashion gay liberation type... gays >>>>> against the nuclear family >>>>> >>>> >>>> >>>> ----- >>>> Lawrence Upton >>>> Visiting Fellow, Music Dept, >>>> Goldsmiths, University of London >>>> New Cross, London SE14 6NW >>>> ---- >>>> >>>> >>> >> >> >> >> -- >> Andrew >> http://hispirits.blogspot.com/ >> http://www.mullamullapress.com/QWERTY >> BLUE ROSE enovel avail. at Amazon, Smashwords and >> http://etextpress.com/books.htm >> >> >> > > > ----- > Lawrence Upton > Visiting Fellow, Music Dept, > Goldsmiths, University of London > New Cross, London SE14 6NW > ---- > > ----- Lawrence Upton Visiting Fellow, Music Dept, Goldsmiths, University of London New Cross, London SE14 6NW ----