Over the decades, from my experience and transformation, I've concluded that there are only two fundamental choices in life. The first, is the choice to take the outward route and align ourselves with what we done: with our credentialed authority, resumes, publications, degrees, and titles; and, we then can define ourselves by what other people think about us with their recognitions and rewards based on what we have done. The second, is the choice to take the inner route and align ourselves with who we are: we can define ourselves by our spirit, our nobility, our sacredness, our humanity for which there are few recognitions and rewards.
Each choice rests itself on choosing between fear or love. It's an either/or choice. It's a matter of choosing of wanting to be in a state of fear or a state of unconditional love. When a student says, "I'm stressed," that's fear. When a faculty member says, "I'm not comfortable doing that," that's fear. When a student says, "I'm not good at," that's fear. When a faculty member says, "But, I don't have tenure," that's fear. When a student says, "I have to drop....," that's fear. When a faculty member says, "I'm not good with....," that's fear. When a student says, "I can't," that's fear. When a faculty member says, "I'm not comfortable with," that's fear. When a student says, "What ifr," that's fear. When a faculty member asks, "Do I need this for my P/T document," that's fear. When a student asks, "Will this be on the test," that's fear. When a faculty member says, "You know what my colleagues will think," that's fear. When a student says, "I'll do anything not to be single," that's fear. When a student utters a self-effacing negative, it's her or his fear speaking. Neither isn't stressed, isn't unable, doesn't hate, doesn't like, isn't good at, doesn't know; that student is afraid, afraid of being wrong, afraid of getting a lower grade, afraid her or his parents won't be proud of her or him, afraid of having the wrong boyfriend or girlfriend, afraid of choosing the wrong major, afraid, afraid, afraid. It's no different with each of us academics.
Fear. Constricting, restricting, enslaving. Imprisoning. I knew it well. It was a dear, corrosive companion of mine, but it was no dear friend. Then, somehow and for some reason, maybe it was the power of crisis, I chose to let go of things past, to get off the worn path of accepted action, to let my epiphany shift my consciousness, to strike out on new paths, and so it took me somewhere else in the very same physical place I was already at. It was a place where I no longer gave fear a seat at the table. It was a place with open front doors, not locked cell doors. That energizing and liberating somewhere else is called "love."
Love. There, in that place, love is so transformative that its incandescence drives away fear's darkness. Yet, unlike an article, book, grant, degree, title, position, love can't be neatly line-itemed on a resume or neatly packaged in a Tenure and Promotion portfolio. To paraphrase something I read, it's like a star: you can't put your hand on it, but it sure is a guide to follow to your potential. I had stumbled on happiness. I slowly found that real inner serenity, fullfillment, meaningfulness, purposefulness are not about doing something outside you; they're about touching that potential that is within you. I slowly learned that judgmentalism, anger, condemnation, resignation, anxiety, and weeding out don't "fix" anything. No amount of fear, living and modeling it, is going to make anyone fearless. No amount of resignation is going make one person excited; no amount of being sick of anything is going to make one person better. No amount of negativity, is going to result in any positive thing. Unconditionally treasuring your own magnificence, unconditionally treasuring the magnificence of each student, does.
But, the problem is: whom to specifically love. So, for the past two decades, each time I go into a classroom or talk with a student, I ask, "Who is right in front of me to whom I must pay attention?" It's a seminal habit to have, for that question has helped me do everything I do to cut through that obscuring veil, "student," to connect with the each individual person. To do that, I've replaced looking with seeing and hearing with listening: as we do the various beginning-of-the-term "getting to know ya" exercises, when I read each student's journal daily entry, when I look at the "how I feel" word each student writes on the whiteboard, when we briefly discuss the "words for the day" at the beginning of each class, when I read and listen to each face and body. It also showed me that the answer I seek is usually inside me and inside each student. We may be busier than busy, but we cannot let that question or the truth of the answer get lost in the shuffle. If we do, we lapse into and are imprisoned by impersonal, stereotypic, generalized, and skewed assumption and perception. The result more often than not is a misinterpretation or what the psychologists call "attitbution error."
Sure, most of us don't pay attention to character development as part of our job description. We display an uneasiness when we're faced with the language of morality beyond the clinical word "plagarism." But, I have come to believe that you cannot fully consider student achievement or lack of it merely by looking at tests, papers, projects, grades, or GPAs. Other than that intellectual and academic word, we tend to reject any responsibility to consciously instil virtuousness. Now, I'm not talking about Zen or Greek philosophy, or even Judaeo-Christian theology. Well, I am because I'm talking about respect, kindness, cooperation, consideration, compromise, self-control, reliability, self-esteem, self-confidence, service, and all that which goes into living by the entire Golden Rule--or my Teacher's Oath. Like it or not, we're moral evaluators and we are actors in a morality play. Haim Ginott reminds us, each of us, whether was like it or not, is a spiritual leader; we can chose pathologically to be self-focused, uncaringly or conditionally pulling a few students into our own limited ego while disdaining and disrespecting and discarding most others rather than unconditionally honoring each of them; or, we can chose therapeutically to make care our core, to accord each student the unconditional dignity and respect to which each is entitled; we can chose to approach each student with the realization that there is no condition to loving and no limit to loving.
With unconditional belief, kindness, empathy, compassion, service, learning, we can help ourselves and each student have a chance to think and feel differently about ourselves, her/himself, and others; to grow and transform, and thereby muster the courage to walk new roads. After all, whether credentialed faculty or yet-to-be credentialed student, isn't achievement made by those who do what they were afraid to do, made by those who expand their horizons, , made by those who discover that there are no limits to learning and improving and achieving, made by those who see what they can become by nudging themselves away from their stationary "I am," made by those who do what they did not previously know they could do, made by those who reach for what they cannot yet touch? Neither student nor us can push forward by fearfully staying safe and comfortable; or, bring new passion and strength to our lives by avoiding the path least traveled; or, discover amazing and untapped ability by holding tightly to the tired excuses, worn rationales, and outdated assumptions; or, unwrap and use the transcending gifts of discovering new experiences, new skills, new knowledge, new self-esteem, and new self-confidence by accepting the limits of the old. Leo Buscaglia was right on point, and the recent cognitive and neuro-research backs him up. Nothing is meaningless and wasted when we live from a social place; from a place holding hands, connecting with, and being in community with love.
So, it boils down to this, we have to go beyond displaying our credentials and helping students get credentialed. We have to teach both our discipline and life. We have to live and model four all encompassing life values: an unconditional open and generous heart to all, an unconditional empathy and compassion for all, an unconditional kindliness and respectfullness toward all, and service in the interest of others.
Make it a good day
-Louis-
Louis Schmier http://www.therandomthoughts.edublogs.org
Department of History http://www.therandomthoughts.com
Valdosta State University
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