Self-doubt and belief :
Written for a colleague going through the former:
Lord,
The constant driving,
Incessant striving,
The expectations
And justifications…
I can’t keep up with
Life’s palpitations….
Awaking from a restless night
I’ve lost the will to face the fight
The ‘To Do’ list just increasing
Guilt and apathy competing.
I admit an inability to cope.
Life’s lost that lustre of a living hope.
Lord,
Where is your ‘peace’, Shalom today?
Is this just blind acceptance come what may?
I’ve told others to keep faith and trust still
In whatever happens, good or ill.
I never thought I would make these confessions
Or even pose these disturbing questions.
Restore to me the joy of salvation
Father, send your love and restoration.
Heal my restive spirit, burnt out soul.
Give me the humility of pacing.
I need ‘time-outs’, wisdom to avoid the racing,
The skill to challenge negative feelings and thoughts
To be released from the tyranny of others’ ‘oughts’.
Lord,
I need this space to draw refreshment
From Your springs, to recover contentment,
The inspiration and reassurance
That you are here in whatever circumstance.
Come alongside, give that Living Water
Renew my mind and vision whenever they falter.
Brian E. WakemanFree-lance Educational Consultant