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Hmnn, well, that's an interesting take, Judy. It was a very quick one, & I would agree that anything that smacks of 'explanation' should go. So, yep, cut. Doug On 11-Feb-10, at 8:49 AM, Judy Prince wrote: > I agree w Partick but couldnae figure out why; now think it's bcuz > of a > shift in tone. First stanza feels dreamy, "describing" and evoking > a mood; > second stanza's like a teacher trying to explain/apply an economic > theory. > And I can't grasp a reason for the contrast, therefore opt for > stanza 1's > tone alone. > > What's your take on it, Doug? > > Judy Douglas Barbour [log in to unmask] http://www.ualberta.ca/~dbarbour/ Latest books: Continuations (with Sheila E Murphy) http://www.uap.ualberta.ca/UAP.asp?LID=41&bookID=664 Wednesdays' http://abovegroundpress.blogspot.com/2008/03/new-from-aboveground-press_10.html Swept snow, Li Po, by dawn's 40-watt moon to the road that hies to office away from home. Lorine Niedecker