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HAHA Joe beautiful KS On 15/11/2007, joe green <[log in to unmask]> wrote: > Fine, fine. But I recommend this. One must have a garment that has 32 > pockets -- one for each county in Ireland. > > Here's my kit. And I am glad that I brought it here. > > > *The 32 Pockets of Bertrand O'Toole* > > > > Pocket #1: A purse, of the "small change" type formerly carried > by misers and presidents of Standard Oil, black, distressed leather, > used for holding mechanical moths which when released cry "Help me. > Help me, Neighbor!" Used when impersonating Old Scratch and > for moments of merriment when attending Board Meetings. > > Pocket #2: "The Jest Book of the Dead" -- a compendium of jokes > guaranteed to crack up the Dead. "Why did the chicken cross the > road? To get to the Other Side." &c. > > Pocket#3: A set of knuckledusters and a scimitar. > > Pocket#4: A set of cock's wattles. > > Pocket#5: Devil's Glen Scotch -- for private consumption. > > Pocket#6: Quizzing glasses > > Pocket#7: A folding tent for privacy while changing one's bad breeches > > Pocket#8: My shadow, the Count Chiasimo > > Pocket#9 A complete "artificial glen" with rocks, and artificial > moon , and forester's station. Excellent for achieving the effect > of the sublime without going out-of-doors. > > Pocket#10: A sad Rilkean mirror. > > Pocket#11: A list off all elements as they should be arranged in > benevolent natural order. > > Pocket#12 My special scents (in silver flasks) -- "Water Frozen by > Boredom" -- "Theological Scruples" > > Pocket#13 Swiss Army Knife with Unix workstation. > > Pocket #14: An ingenious self-defending peacock > > Pocket#15: Instructions for completing my tomb. > > Pocket#16: A Ventroloquist's "Helper" -- Recordings for Divers > Occasions, especially cries to put in the mouths of enemies -- > "God Bless Captain Vere!" "Les jeux sont faits!" &c > > Pocket#17: A Little Devil > > Pocket#18: A tuningfork for snoring > > Pocket#19: A silk ladder for descending from boudoirs > > Pocket#20: A bellygun stolen from a crusty old toper. > > Pocket#21: A set of gingerbread noses. > > Pocket#22: The star called Childsbottom. > > Pocket#23: A faded 1860 print of Goethe ascending the Brocken > > Pocket#24: A shrivelled potato > > Pocket#25: Instructions for broiling steaks on one's tongue > > Pocket#26: Begob the Bobwob -- chalk drawing > > Pocket#27: A basilisk awaiting further orders > > Pocket#28: A Pocket Guide to the Vilest Bonzes (1879 edition) > > Pocket#29: Game Ball for the Current Universe > > Pocket#30: A collection of sock holes -- includes holes from the hose > of the Bride of Lammermoor and the Mother of the Maccabees. > > Pocket#31: Ravishing thoughts and sentimental correspondance > > Pocket#32: The Royal Academy of Berlin, countless butterflies swarming > over a shreiking entablature, Shelley's children, a peanut butter > sandwich. > > > > On 11/15/07, kasper salonen <[log in to unmask]> wrote: > > > > hee haw. > > and bring your snowshoes & a couple quarts of vodka if you're in Finland > > > > KS > > > > On 15/11/2007, Halvard Johnson <[log in to unmask]> wrote: > > > Sonnet: Your Emergency Preparedness Kit > > > > > > What you'll need in your kit, of course, depends on the kind > > > of emergency you plan to have and where you plan to have it. > > > If you're in France and plan to have an emergency on the road > > > > > > be sure to take along a corkscrew, five bottles of wine, three or > > > four baguettes, some fine, pungent cheese, and a red and white > > > checkered tablecloth. In much of the rest of Europe and in Cali- > > > > > > fornia, mostly the same. In Latin America, much the same. But > > > in Canada be sure to have a charged cell phone, and in the US > > > a fistful of credit cards, and your Triple-A card. A six-pack of beer > > > > > > would be a comfort. In many parts of the world you can rely on > > > friendly locals to pull you out of a ditch, give you a push, or carry > > > you, your wife and kids off to a nearby clinic or hospital. In case > > > > > > of serious injuries, it's a good idea to have several units of blood > > > for each of you. And in Texas, of course, you're on your own. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Hal > > > > > > Halvard Johnson > > > ================ > > > [log in to unmask] > > > http://home.earthlink.net/~halvard/index.html > > > http://entropyandme.blogspot.com > > > http://imageswithoutwords.blogspot.com > > > http://www.hamiltonstone.org > > > http://home.earthlink.net/~halvard/vidalocabooks.html > > > > > > > > > -- > Joseph Green > The Pleasant Reviewer > Headmaster, St. John Boscoe Laboratory School > > Switchboard Captain, Hollywood Colonial Hotel > > All complaints shall be directed to: > > Camelopard Breathwaite > The Fallows, 200 Fifth Avenue, Fredonia City > > "That's Double Dependability" > > Brought to you by Zenith Trans-Cosmic Radio >