I have to say, I enjoy this poem 102% more now than I did the first few reads. especially the gum & beetle effects. KS On 02/02/07, Caleb Cluff <[log in to unmask]> wrote: > > Thanks Janet - Further to what I wrote before - > > >To be honest it's all over the place, slight, and the result of trying > >to write in a strange hotel room and from a strange emotional position. > >There's more in that shiny horned beetle than the rest, and there's not > >a deal in him. Ack. > > I suppose, at the very least, that the words have struck some people; > but I'm still, on reflection, convinced that it was a process of > imperfect, garbled and somewhat maudlin thought. You know? When it's > 'around' the notion, like a schoolboy too frightened to ask someone out, > hovering and dithering? Got to get in there and think. > > Still - at least I'm not kneeling in front of the Flinders Street > clocks. The footpath is so dirty there. > > Caleb. > > -----Original Message----- > From: Poetryetc provides a venue for a dialogue relating to poetry and > poetics [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On Behalf Of Janet Jackson > Sent: Friday, 2 February 2007 1:12 PM > To: [log in to unmask] > Subject: Re: Late snap - apologies... > > Kasper says > > > "... without myth" is splendid. > > I agree. > > > the rest is unconnected & uninviting (though the imagery bits are > clear & > > good). > > It is hard to make a connection between the final stanza and the rest -- > between the nature images and the people (beings?) and room. > The word "graceless" seems to be the key. > > I wouldn't call it "uninviting" though. The reader is invited to find a > connection in their own way. > > Janet > > > > > On 01/02/07, Caleb Cluff <[log in to unmask]> wrote: > > > > > > Am I so graceless, unable to see > > > at the first cautious whisper of rain, > > > > > > how the gum offers slight green gossip, > > > > > > how the dung beetle, anthracite teardrop, > > > goes about his task without myth, > > > > > > how your eternal face fell > > > as we left the room. > > ------------------------------------------------------- > Janet Jackson <[log in to unmask]> > Poems at Proximity: > http://www.proximity.webhop.net > > The choice is between nonviolence and nonexistence. > Martin Luther King Jr. > ------------------------------------------------------- > > > > > ============================================================================== > The information contained in this email and any attachment is confidential > and > may contain legally privileged or copyright material. It is intended > only for > the use of the addressee(s). If you are not the intended recipient of > this > email, you are not permitted to disseminate, distribute or copy this email > or > any attachments. If you have received this message in error, please > notify the > sender immediately and delete this email from your system. The ABC does > not > represent or warrant that this transmission is secure or virus free. > Before > opening any attachment you should check for viruses. The ABC's liability > is > limited to resupplying any email and attachments > > ============================================================================== >