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Please stop sending me this crap. "Beloved Devine Energy"!!??! BOLLOCKS! What does God mean to me? I think that She's crazy. Russell. ----- Original Message ----- From: "Colin Revell" <[log in to unmask]> To: <[log in to unmask]>; <[log in to unmask]>; <[log in to unmask]>; <[log in to unmask]>; <[log in to unmask]>; <[log in to unmask]>; <[log in to unmask]>; <[log in to unmask]>; <[log in to unmask]>; <[log in to unmask]> Sent: Saturday, October 01, 2005 12:45 PM Subject: [victimisationagainstdisabledpeople] FW: Emailing: spirital.htm > > > > >From: "Hazel Pottage" <[log in to unmask]> > >To: "Colin Revell" > ><[log in to unmask]>,<[log in to unmask]> > >Subject: Emailing: spirital.htm > >Date: Fri, 30 Sep 2005 23:21:34 +0100 > > > >cnvc:: The spiritual basis of NVC > > you are here: home > nvc concepts > spiritual basis > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > spiritual basis of nonviolent communicationsm > > a question and answer session with marshall b. rosenberg, > >ph.d. > > Is spirituality important in the process of Nonviolent > >Communication? > > > > I think it is important that people see that spirituality is > >at the base of Nonviolent Communication, and that they learn the mechanics > >of the process with that in mind. It's really a spiritual practice that I > >am trying to show as a way of life. Even though we don't mention this, > >people get seduced by the practice. Even if they practice this as a > >mechanical technique, they start to experience things between themselves > >and other people they weren't able to experience before. So eventually they > >come to the spirituality of the process. They begin to see that it's more > >than a communication process and realize it's really an attempt to manifest > >a certain spirituality. So I have tried to integrate the spirituality into > >the training in a way that meets my need not to destroy the beauty of it > >through abstract philosophizing. > > > > > > What does God mean to you? > > > > I need a way to think of God that would work for me, other > >words or ways to look at this beauty, this powerful energy, and so my name > >for God is "Beloved Divine Energy." For a while it was just Divine Energy > >but then I was reading some of the Eastern religions, and Eastern poets, > >and I loved how they had this personal, loving connection with this Energy. > >And I found that it added to me to call it "Beloved" Divine Energy. To me > >this Beloved Divine Energy is life, connection to life. > > > > What is your favorite way of knowing Beloved Divine Energy? > > > > It is how I connect with human beings. I know Beloved Divine > >Energy by connecting with human beings in a certain way. I not only see > >Divine Energy, I taste Divine Energy, I feel Divine Energy, and I am Divine > >Energy. I'm connected with Beloved Divine Energy when I > > connect with human beings in this certain way. Then God is > >very alive for me. Also talking with trees, talking with dogs and pigs, > >those are some of my other favorite ways. > > > > > > How did you develop Nonviolent Communication? > > > > Nonviolent Communication evolved from my attempt to get > >conscious of what this Beloved Divine Energy is and how to connect with it. > >I was very dissatisfied with clinical psychology because it is pathology > >based and I didn't like its language. It didn't give me a view of the > >beauty of human beings. So, after I got my degree I decided to go more in > >the direction of Carl Rogers and Abraham Maslow. > > > > I decided to look at this side and ask myself the scary > >question, "What are we and what are we meant to be?" I found that there was > >very little written about this in psychology. So I took a crash course in > >comparative religion because I saw they talked more about this question. > >And this word "love" kept coming up in each of them. > > > > I used to hear the word love as many people use it in a > >religious sense like, "You should love everybody." I used to get really > >annoyed at the word love. "Oh yeah, I'm supposed to love Hitler?" I didn't > >know the words "New Age Bullshit" but I used what was my equivalent then. I > >tried to understand better what love means because I could see it had so > >much meaning for so many millions of people in all of these religions. What > >is it, and how do you do this "love"? > > > > to top of page > > > > Nonviolent Communication really came out of my attempt to > >understand this concept of love and how to manifest it, how to do it. I > >came to the conclusion that it was not just something you feel, but it is > >something we manifest, something we do, something we have. And what is this > >manifestation? It is giving of ourselves in a certain way. > > > > What do you mean, "giving of ourselves"? > > > > To me, giving of ourselves means an honest expression of > >what's alive in us in this moment. It intrigues me why every culture asks > >upon greeting each other, "How are you?" It's such an important question. > >What a gift it is to be able to know at any given moment what is alive in > >someone. > > > > To give a gift of one's self is a manifestation of love. It is > >when you reveal yourself nakedly and honestly, at any given moment, for no > >other purpose than as a gift of what's alive in you. Not to blame, > >criticize, or punish. Just "Here I am, and here is what I would like." This > >is my vulnerability at this moment. To me, that is a way of manifesting > >love. > > > > And the other way we give of ourselves is through how we > >receive another person's message. To receive it empathically, connecting > >with what's alive in them, making no judgment. Just to hear what is alive > >in the other person and what they would like. So Nonviolent Communication > >is just a manifestation of what I understand love to be. > > > > Nonviolent Communication came out of your desire to manifest > >love? > > > > I was also helped by empirical research in psychology that > >defined the characteristics of healthy relationships and by studying people > >who were living manifestations of loving people. Out of these sources I > >pulled together this process that helped me to connect with people in what > >I could understand is a loving way. > > > > And then I saw what happened when I did connect with people in > >this way. This beauty, this power, connected me with an energy that I > >choose to call Beloved Divine Energy. So Nonviolent Communication helps me > >stay connected with that beautiful Divine Energy within myself and to > >connect with it in others. And certainly when I connect that Divine Energy > >within myself with the Divine Energy in others, what happens then is the > >closest I know of what it is to be connected to God. > > > > How do you prevent Ego from interfering with your connection > >with God? > > > > By seeing Ego as very closely tied to the way my culture has > >trained me to think, and trained me to communicate. And how the culture has > >trained me to meet my needs in certain ways, to get my needs mixed up with > >certain strategies I might use to meet my needs. So I try to remain > >conscious of these three ways that the culture has programmed me to do > >things that really aren't in my best interest, to function more from Ego > >than from my connection with Divine Energy. I have tried to learn ways for > >training myself to be conscious when I'm thinking in these culturally > >learned ways and I've incorporated these into Nonviolent Communication. > > > > to top of page > > > > Then you believe that the language of our culture prevents us > >from knowing our Divine Energy more intimately? > > > > Oh yes, definitely. I think our language makes it really hard, > >especially the language given to us by the cultural training most of us > >seem to have gone through, and the associations "God" brings up for people. > >Judgmental, or right/wrong thinking is one of the hardest things I've found > >to overcome in teaching Nonviolent Communication over the years. The people > >that I work with have all gone to schools and churches and it's very easy > >for them, if they like Nonviolent Communication, to say it's the "right > >way" to communicate. It's very easy to think that Nonviolent Communication > >is the goal. > > > > I've altered a Buddhist parable that relates to this question. > >Imagine a beautiful, whole, and sacred place. And imagine that you could > >really know God when you are in that place. But let's say that there is a > >river between you and that place and you'd like to get to that place but > >you've got to get over this river to do it. So you get a raft, and this > >raft is a real handy tool to get you over the river. Once you're across the > >river you can walk the rest of the several miles to this beautiful place. > >But the Buddhist parable ends by saying that, "One is a fool who continues > >on to the sacred place carrying the raft on their back." > > > > Nonviolent Communication is a tool to get me over my cultural > >training so I can get to the place. It's not the place. If we get addicted > >to the raft, attached to the raft, it makes it harder to get to the place. > >People just learning the process of Nonviolent Communication can forget all > >about the place. If they get too locked into the raft, the process becomes > >mechanical. > > > > Nonviolent Communication is one of the most powerful tools > >that I've found for connecting with people in a way that helps me get to > >the place where we are connected to the Divine, where what we do toward one > >another comes out of Divine Energy. That's the place I want to get to. > > > > Is this the spiritual basis of Nonviolent Communication? > > > > The spiritual basis for me is that I'm trying to connect with > >the Divine Energy in others and connect them with the Divine in me, because > >I believe that when we are really connected with that Divinity within each > >other and ourselves, that people enjoy contributing to one > > another's well being more than anything else. So for me, if > >we're connected with the Divine in others and ourselves, we are going to > >enjoy what happens, and that's the spiritual basis. In this place violence > >is impossible. > > > > Is this lack of connection to Divine Energy responsible for > >violence in the world? > > > > I would say it this way: I think we have been given the gift > >of choice to create the world of our choosing. And we've been given all of > >this great and abundant world for creating a world of joy and nurturing. To > >me, the violence in the world comes about when we get alienated or > >disconnected from this Energy. How do we get connected when we are educated > >to be disconnected? I believe it's our cultural conditioning and education > >that disconnects us from God, especially our education about God. > > > > Walter Wink writes about how domination cultures use certain > >teachings about God to maintain oppression. That's why Bishops and Kings > >have often been closely related. The Kings needed the Bishops to justify > >the oppression, to interpret the holy books in ways that justified > >punishment, domination, and so forth. > > > > to top of page > > > > How do we overcome this conditioning? > > > > I'm often in between people in a lot of pain. I remember > >working with twenty Serbians and twenty Croatians. Some of the people there > >had family members killed by the other side and they all had generations of > >poison pumped into their heads about the other side. They spent three days > >expressing their rage and pain to each other. Fortunately we were there > >about seven days. > > > > One word I haven't used yet in speaking about this is the word > >"inevitability". So many times I have seen that no matter what has > >happened, if people connect in this certain way that it is inevitable that > >they will end up enjoying giving to one another. It is inevitable. For me > >my work is like watching the magic show. It's too beautiful for words. > > > > But sometimes this Divine Energy doesn't work as fast as I > >think it should. I remember sitting there in the middle of all this rage > >and pain and thinking, "Divine Energy, if you can heal all this stuff why > >are you taking so long, why are you putting these people through this?" And > >the Energy spoke to me, and it said, "You just do what you can to connect. > >Bring your energy in. Connect and help the other people connect and let me > >take care of the rest." But even though that was going on in one part of my > >brain, I knew joy was inevitable. If we could just keep getting connected > >to our own Divine Energy and to each other's. > > > > And it happened. It happened with great beauty. The last day > >everybody was talking about joy. And many of them said, "You know I thought > >I was never going to feel joy again after what we've been through." This > >was the theme on everybody's lips. So that evening the twenty Serbians and > >twenty Croatians, who seven days earlier had only unimaginable pain in > >relation to one another, celebrated the joy of life together. > > > > We gain this connection to each other by knowing God? > > > > Here again I want to stay away from intellectualizing about > >God. If by "knowing God" we mean this intimate connection with Beloved > >Divine Energy, then we gain every second as experiencing heaven. > > > > The heaven I gain from knowing God is this inevitability, to > >know it is inevitable, that no > > matter what the hell is going on that if we get to this level > >of connection with each other, > > if we get in touch with each other's Divine Energy, it's > >inevitable that we will enjoy giving and we'll give back to life. I've been > >through such ugly stuff with people that I don't get worried about it > >anymore, it's inevitable. If we get that quality of connection, we'll like > >where it gets us. > > > > It amazes me how effective it is. I could tell you similar > >examples between the extremist > > Israelis, both politically and religiously, and the same on > >the Palestinian side, and between > > the Hutus and the Tutsis, and the Christian tribe in Nigeria. > >With all of them it amazes me > > how easy it is to bring about this reconciliation and healing. > >Once again, all we have to do > > is get both sides connected to the other person's needs. To me > >the needs are the quickest, closest way to getting in connection with that > >Divine Energy. Everyone has the same needs. The needs come because we're > >alive. > > > > How do you get enemies to recognize that they need to give to > >each other? > > > > A: When you get people connected at that level it's hard to > >maintain those "enemy" images. Nonviolent Communication in its purity is > >the most powerful, quickest way I've found to get people to go from life > >alienated ways of thinking where they want to hurt each other, to enjoying > >giving to each other. > > > > When you have a couple of people facing each other, Hutu and > >Tutsi, and their families have been killed by each other, it's amazing that > >in two or three hours we can get them nurturing each other. It's > >inevitable. Inevitable. That's why I use this approach. > > > > It amazes me how simple it is given the amount of suffering > >that has gone on, and how quickly it can happen. Nonviolent Communication > >really quickly heals when people have experienced a lot of pain. This > >motivates me to want to make it happen even more quickly because the way > >we're doing it now still takes a while. > > > > to top of page > > > > How do we get this done more quickly with the other 800,000 > >Hutus and Tutsis, and the rest of the planet? I would like to explore what > >would happen if we could make movies or television shows of this process, > >because I've seen that when two people go through the process with other > >people watching, that vicarious learning, healing and reconciliations > >happen. So I would like to explore ways to use the media to get masses of > >people to go quickly through this process together. > > > > Have you encountered any cultural or language barriers to this > >process? > > > > A: This amazes me how few and how little they are. When I > >first started to teach this process in another language I really doubted > >that it could be done. I remember the first time I was in Europe I was > >going to go first to Munich and then to Geneva. My colleague and I both > >doubted that we could get this through in another language. She was going > >to do it in French and I would be there for her to ask me questions if > >something came up. I was going to at least try to see if we could go > >through translators. But it worked so well without any problems, and I find > >the same thing everywhere. So I just don't worry about it, I'll do it in > >English and you translate it and it works very well. I can't think of any > >culture that we've had any problem with other than little things, but not > >with the essence of it. Not only have we had no problem but also there are > >repeated variations of people saying that this is essentially what their > >religion says. It's old stuff, they know this stuff, and they're grateful > >for this manifestation, but it's nothing new. > > > > Do you believe a spiritual practice is important for > >practicing nonviolence? > > > > I recommend in all workshops that people take time to ask > >themselves this question, "How do I choose to connect with other human > >beings?" and to be as conscious as they can about that. To make sure it's > >their choice and not the way they've been programmed to choose. Really, > >what is the way you would choose to connect with other human beings? > > > > Gratitude also plays a big role for me. If I express gratitude > >when I am conscious of the > > human act that I want to express it for, consciousness of how > >I feel when the act occurs, > > whether it's my act or someone else's, and what needs of mine > >it fulfills, then expressing gratitude fills me with consciousness of the > >power that we human beings have to enrich lives. It makes me aware that we > >are Divine Energy, that we have such power to make life wonderful, and that > >there is nothing we like better than to do just that. > > > > To me, that is powerful evidence of our Divine Energy, that we > >have this power to make life so wonderful, and that there is nothing we > >like more. That's why part of my spiritual practice is just to be conscious > >of gratitude. > > > > How basic is this need to give to one another? > > > > I think the need to enrich life is one of the most basic and > >powerful needs we all have. Now another way to say this is that we need to > >act from the Divine Energy within us. And I think that when we "are" that > >Divine Energy that there is nothing we like more, nothing in which we find > >more joy, than enriching life, than using our immense power to enrich life. > > > > But when we are trying to meet this need of ours to "live" > >this Divine Energy, trying to contribute to life, there is a request that > >goes with it. We have a request for feedback > > from whichever creature whose life we are trying to enrich. We > >want to know in fact, "Is > > my intention and my action being fulfilled?" Was there > >fulfillment? > > > > In our culture that request gets distorted into our thinking > >that we have a "need" for the other person to love us for what we've done, > >to appreciate what we've done, to approve of us for what we've done. And > >that distorts and screws up the beauty of the whole process. It wasn't > >their approval that we needed. Our very intent was to use our energy to > >enrich life. But we need the feedback. How do I know my effort was > >successful unless I get feedback? > > > > And I can use this feedback to help me know if I am coming out > >of Divine Energy. I know that I am coming out of Divine Energy when I value > >criticism as much as a thank you. > > > > -Marshall B. Rosenberg, Ph.D. > > > > to top of page > > contact cnvc cnvc sitemap > > > > > > Subscribe to: NVC QuickConnect > > > > search > > this site > > > > > > > > > > [who we are] > > [nvc concepts] > > what is nvc? > > spiritual basis.en > > bases espirituales.sp > > 10 steps to peace > > feelings lists > > needs satisfied > > not satisfied > > needs list > > nvc model > > nvc sound bytes > > [learn/teach nvc] > > [resources] > > [articles/writings] > > [getting involved] > > [connect with us] > > [news/celebration] > > > > > > > > > > > > > > who we are nvc concepts learn/teach nvc resources > >articles/writings getting involved connect with us news/celebration > > www.cnvc.org email cnvc +1.818.957.9393 © Center for Nonviolent > >Communication, 1998-2005 page updated: 11/21/2003 > > > > _________________________________________________________________ > MSN Messenger 7.5 is now out. Download it for FREE here. > http://messenger.msn.co.uk > > > ------------------------ Yahoo! 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