 |
 |
Diana Just read your email and perhaps you might like to hear some of my story!! My Dad died 18 April 2000. My brother and I have had an on-off relationship -more off than on since his 3rd marriage 11 years ago. Anyway, here we are, in crisis, meeting in grief. My Dad did a wonderful thing for us, he gave us a bridge which we can now choose to cross. We put issues behind us, I had a great time getting re-acquainted with my neices and nephew. We saw that now meeting at ages nearly 40 and 47 respectively, that we can relate together in "adult" ways and surprise, surprise we have many similar opinions. The sister-in-law has also used this to begin to rebuild a relationship and I can't tell you how much this helps the natural grief-hurt. It is very early days, and it needs to be remembered not to leap in with both feet, but we will see ..... So far, it is very positive and if you have any more detailed questions you want to ask me I would be happy to respond, probably better privately so e-mail back to my home address if you want to. LA ----- Original Message ----- From: <[log in to unmask]> To: <[log in to unmask]> Sent: 09 May 2000 14:38 Subject: bereavement > Dear List, > > Has anybody had experience, either personal or professional, of family > interaction arising at times of significant loss. > > What I am interested in is how families interact at times of significant > loss. In particular when families have become estranged through 2nd > marriages, moving away from each other geographically and so on... and then > coming together when a pivotal family member dies. > > What occurs? or is likely to occur? Do families fall back into the positions > they occupied within the family before they moved away or does something else > occur? Do old resentments arise. What occurs when a family member has > changed significantly and refuses to occupy its old family position and > therefore function, such as, 'The carer' or 'the black sheep' or the > 'scapegoat' or do all these roles get > re-enacted whenever a family meets, i.e. at xmas, anniversaries, wedding, > etc. or is loss different? > > look forward to your comments > > Diana > %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%