>>I am working in academia again
in a one year position (after 4 years in hiatus) and I have been
a
mostly solitary follower of the Goddess since 1990 or so. I see
so many
of you on that path too and applaud your willingness to speak
freely. I
am feeling constrained about my faith association and not knowing
how
open I can be about that on my campus.
My first advice as a fellow priestess, is DON'T.
I speak here as one who has championed openness in the past, and
I was one of the architects of the UK Pagan community becoming
publicly recognised during the '80s and '90s.
Far too often people profess to be open minded and they don't
even realise themselves how powerfully their feelings have been
shaped by persistent Christian propaganda all their lives. This I
have encountered repeatedly as people make friendly welcoming
noises in theory and then move into rudeness, ostracism etc once
my faith is openly declared. Lifelong propaganda by one of the
world's most powerful institutions cannot be overcome by a couple
of courteous conversations.
Individual liaison is different. There you might have great
success in confiding in one or two likely individuals. But choose
carefully, and only during next semester, not now. They must have
plenty of time to digest you as a sensible person so this
understanding can combat the irrational ideas of "devil
worshipper" "heathen" that surface once you declare yourself. The
Church and Hollywood together have a powerful grip on people's
fantasies!
In particular my first years as a postgrad were hellish because
my first supervisor stupidly boasted of acquiring an interesting
PhD to supervise. As a result instead of letting people get to
know me naturally, and showing them my faith as and when they
seemed ready or interested, I was exposed early on, and duly
suffered for it.
Don't forget that our people are fighting social workers to keep
their children; fighting spouses to retain custody in divorce
settlements; having to conceal their faith to keep jobs; getting
bricks through windows if they try to run a local busines; being
harrassed by local councils for ditto.
Academic theology is already feeling highly challenged by the
whole Study of Religions field. The vista of complete female
divinity, absolute female social and religious authority, and an
immanent thealogy, is deeply disturbing to established interests.
When people feel threatened around their turf they attack.
As Dagmar suggested you can opt to be a martyr. But I think that
viewing martyrs long ago across the centuries occurring for a
brief period, is very different to becoming part opf the
centuries of discrimination and persecution by Church bodies and
Church associated institutions now.
If your temperament is a social revolutionary and you love
combat, go ahead and make an example of yourself. Your work will
suffer. So will your health unless it blows over fast which is
unlikely. You will create a reputation as a troublemaker,
unstable, untrustworthy, which will follow you for years.
You could be a mini Mary Daly and gather a network around you of
passionate co-believers. This could be very exciting. But I warn
you after only a few media interviews they become unpleasant and
boring experiences one suffers in a good cause. And Mary Daly had
a pretty solid standing before she squared up to the
establishment, and still she lost her job.
Unless you just want to enjoy this one year and accept that
revealing yourself may very likely block any chance of getting
another like it I'd stay very quiet on campus re your faith.
Confide in a trusted few by all means. Construct ambiguous
statements for students where they can derive support without
being able to quote anything against you. By the end of next term
you might be able to be more open with les personal risk.
Again martyrs are exciting stories are great to read, appalling
to live. The forwarding of Goddess spirituality does not ask for
it. ("Nor do I demand sacrifice" The Charge) but instead for us
to live in the fullest richest most beautiful and pleasureable
way we can.
I have slowly pieced together a personal network of scholars who
are genuinely able to accept and respect my faith. That has taken
a lot more than one year. So please don't crash your one precious
year. Use it to gently create some small openings on which you
can build later. Then when you have built some authority, got
some publications out, become part of the conference circuit etc
and with the support of a longer contract, or from a strong
independent position, you can creatively and effectively use a
strategy of openness.
Be patient - we're on the way. Losing you to a premature bustup
won't help.
Priestess Shan Jayran
Ovular/ Associate Lecturer University College Chichester/ current
PhD
www.ovular.co.uk
