>From ("An Explanation of Japan)
The Perfect Dog
For Kurt Singer
i
this dog does not shit
no need to follow it
with a plastic bag and spade
this dog does not wank
against your leg and nor
does it fuck
this dog needs no vet
no need to pay out for this or that
shot,
this dog does not run off
this dog does not bark
this dog needs no water or food
this dog does not bother the
neighbours' cat
this dog does not age and become
"uncute"
ii
this dog can be programmed
to love you everyday
it does this by flashing a green light
and when it is angry, a red light
it has an extensive repertoire
of tricks and moods, controlled
by a very flashy and expensive computer
software
so when you come home
you can in the future
program the robodog to whine
and maybe in the next Millennium
it will be waterproof
and you can actually go out
and the latest model might shit
and maybe it might propagate
itself, and maybe it will even die
and there is even the distinct possibility
you might actually cry
at the loss
of your dear departed cyber companion.
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