"Damp Squib"
instructions to reciter: to be read in a music hall voice or in the voice of
Reggie Perrin when he down on his luck.
a new board game
for two to four players
pieces include British poets, readers
and publishers
a set of two cards, one called sarcasm the
other masochism, the object of the game
is to inhibit
the other player from becoming a name
and making money from writing poetry,
to do this involves self-laceration
in public, and dollops of shallow wit,
and wherever
possible sarky comments about
the mainstream and publication
"the very thought makes one vomit"
and like the dufflecoated brethren
who meet in pubs across the country
to play dungeons and dragons
the game is in set in a pub
called the "donkey with no Tale"
here the players must gather
and drink their whiskey or real ale
and then in a state of bleary-eyed
misery, they start to take the micky
out of each other's contribution
but like football fans they have their
favourites whom they defend with vigor
of the hooligans and heathens
and they are raucous in their applause
for those who self-lacerate and are erudite
for those who tease out their abuse
and set it to music, from mother's and father's
wandering hands come this new aesthetic
and each time the player picks up a card
on which a corporation's logo is printed
they must stand up and deliver a curse
otherwise they will forfeit a go at reading
their verse...................
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