These amused me. Thought they were worth sharing.
> Recently reported in the Massachusetts Bar Association Lawyers
> journal, the following are questions actually asked of witnesses by
> attorneys during trials and, in certain cases, the responses given by
> insightful witnesses:
>
>Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he
> doesn't know about it until the next morning?
> Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
> A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
>
> Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
> A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
> Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
> A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.
>
> Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
> A: No.
> Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
> A: No.
> Q: Did you check for breathing?
> A: No.
> Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began
>the autopsy?
> A: No.
> Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
> A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
> Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
> A: It is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law
>somewhere.
Dr R I Johnson
The Family Practice, Church Lane, Sleaford, NG34 7DF
Tel. 01529 305595 Mobile 0378 206475 Fax No 01529 305589
Single handed GP. Send email to [log in to unmask]
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