Adrian Elliot-Smith <[log in to unmask]> writes

>>And as for the term *full time mother* - 


>I currently fulfill this role in our family.

I think a father can be a mother.
Some men are naturally maternal.

> Started this term when my wife
>commenced a teaching career in a school some distance away.

I sometimes think that the period of change when roles shift is the most
difficult, probably for the parents more than the children. No matter
how supportive one is or intends to be, changing the *lead housekeeper*
is as stressful as starting a new job.
 
> Fully appreciate
>the committment and pressure of the situation but I wonder if I am as easily
>accepted for it in the practice as if I were female. Dreading the inevitable
>day when one of my five children

5? you have my admiration (and a tinge of jealousy)

> is too ill to leave with friends or
>relatives (if indeed we had any locally).
>
>What do you do when this happens Katie and how does the practice take it?

Arrangements have varied in time, from full time nanny (I could write a
book on related experiences), through my mother (3 hrs away, but
dialysis prevents her doing so now), to child lying in sideroom while I
do surgery.  My partners have been fantastic (apart from ex one who
demanded effective contraception when I joined practice).  One of them
even collected my daughter from school himself!  

Hospital admissions are slightly easier to organise - I take those as
holiday if possible. I have taken calls while waiting in OPD with them.
They enjoy coming on calls with me - especially when there's a chance
they see in the ambulance etc.  

I will never forget a family planning session I did when Sarah was
nearly 3 - she was happily colouring in the corner while I removed a
lady's coil and did a smear - or so I thought, until a small head
appeared to my right, standing on the step stool on tiptoe saying "I
can't see Mummy" ... (very understanding patient - all were asked
beforehand and Sarah went out with nurse when they preferred)

It must get easier as Hannah is almost 13, but I rely heavily on my
partners teenage daughters and sons to babysit for evening meetings.


-- 
Katie 


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