I found this one in today's Guardian.
It's yet another story spreading on the Internet.
Don't read this whilst eating or drinking (I nearly choked).
>From the pages of the Bloomberg News Service...
"In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But i was only trying
to retrieve the gerbil," Vito Bustone told bemused doctors in the Severe
Burns Unit of Salt Lake City Hospital.
Bustone, and his homosexual partner Kiki Rodriguez, had been admitted for
emergency treatment after a felching session had gone seriously wrong. "I
pushed a cardboard tube up his rectum and slipped Raggot, our gerbil, in,"
he explained. "As usual, Kiki shouted out "Armageddon", my cue that he'd had
enough. I tried to retrieve Raggot but he wouldn't come out again, so i
peered into the tube and struck a match, thinking the light might attract
him.
At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman described what happened
next. "The match ignited a pocket of intestinal gas and a flame shot up the
tube, igniting Mr Bustone's moustache and severely burning his face. It also
set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers which in turn ignited a larger
pocket of gas further up the intestine, propelling the rodent out like a
cannonball."
Bustone suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from the impact of
the gerbil, while Rodriguez suffered first and second degree burns to his
anus and lower intestinal tract. Sheriff Hugo Root later told reporters;
"It's Raggot i feel sorry for. Being stuffed up some queen's tradesman's
entrance..." (Bloomberg News Service)
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