[apologies to those of a sensitive disposition]
[shouldn't be any such people on GP-UK]
One day, two retired surgeons went fishing. They hired a boat and
went out onto a lake. However, the fish weren't biting and the
conversation turned (as it has a habit of so doing when two surgeons
get together) to their past glorious exploits.
Mr Hackem said, "Aye, in my day I was the best surgeon alive. My
reputation spread far and wide. Fundholders would enter into
contracts with my trust only on the understanding that I personally
did all the procedures."
Mr Cuttem scoffed, "You couldn't lance a boil without cutting into
an artery. I've seen better surgeons at the local abattoir."
Never one to give in gracefully, Mr Hackem decided to prove his
surgical skills to his fishing partner. He scanned the edges of the
lake until he spotted an sleeping owl perched on a limb of an
ancient oak tree. "I bet I could climb that tree and perform a
tonsillectomy on that sleeping owl without waking it up!"
As Mr Cuttem chuckled to himself, Mr Hackem swam to the shore,
climbed the tree and removed the tonsils from the sleeping owl
without waking it up.
Not to be outdone, Mr Cuttem said, "Right, I bet I can castrate that
owl without waking it up."
Mr Hackem sat at the base of the tree, water dripping from his face.
He watched in astonishment as Mr Cuttem climbed the tree and removed
the owl's genitals while it was still sleeping.
The two surgeons shook hands, agreed that they were equally skilled
surgeons and went back to their fishing.
Two weeks later, just before dawn, the owl in question was flying
over the lake with one of his owl pals. The other owl said, "Hey,
why don't we fly over to that old oak tree and settle down for some
sleep."
The first owl said, "No way. I slept there a couple of weeks ago.
Ever since, I haven't been able to hoot worth a fuck or fuck worth a
hoot!"
:)
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