I agree, & also with Lawrence about the final line.
Especially liked this turn & sound image:
listening to rain, percussive
on the furnace pipe.
Doug
> On Jun 20, 2017, at 11:08 AM, Lawrence Upton <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>
> Yes, it is very fine.
> I am not sure that you need that final and separate line. I think the poem
> is saying that all the way through
>
> L
>
> On 20 June 2017 at 17:22, Sheila Murphy <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>
>> I like this very much, Sharon. Reciprocal weather and personal reality.
>> Very fine. Sheila
>>
>> On Tue, Jun 20, 2017 at 8:40 AM, sharon brogan <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>>
>>> You leave and then
>>>
>>> it rains and rains.
>>>
>>> Flood warnings
>>>
>>> for Ovando, Seeley
>>>
>>> Garnet, Greenough,
>>>
>>> Clearwater. The garden
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> glistens, glitter on lilac
>>>
>>> leaves in shafts of sun.
>>>
>>> I sit alone on the wooden
>>>
>>> bench, hood up, smoking,
>>>
>>> listening to rain, percussive
>>>
>>> on the furnace pipe. This old
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> body hums. My knee aches
>>>
>>> and I try to remember where
>>>
>>> I put the cane. I remind myself:
>>>
>>> weather changes. This land
>>>
>>> will be dry again. There will
>>>
>>> be drought.
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> Come back.
>>>
>>>
>>>
>>> --
>>> sharon brogan
>>> http://www.sbpoet.com
>>> http://www.sbpoet.net
>>> http://smallpoems.sbpoet.net
>>> 406.578.1788
>>>
>>
Douglas Barbour
[log in to unmask]
https://eclecticruckus.wordpress.com/
Recent publications: (With Sheila E Murphy) Continuations & Continuations 2 (UofAPress).
Recording Dates (Rubicon Press).
Listen. If (UofAPress):
I go down to the Twilight Arcade
and watch the Martian invaders,
already appalled by our language,
pointing at what they want.
Bill Manhire
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