No conqueror, this William,
No particular Will
to speak of even.
Guillaume to the French,
Vasilly to the Greeks,
Bog standard Bill
to those who know him
and even those who don't.
Bill please, waiter.
No Willy as in Wagtail
or schlong. Nor Billy,
the goat, just Bill.
Rhymes with dill
and pill, both epithets
he strives to avoid.
No trouble for some
as form of address,
just an easy opening
lip-pushed 'B'
followed by that
short vowel 'i',
pushing tongue
to mouth front and
spreading cheeks
to smile position.
It's those final 'l's
that lead to grief.
Requires tongue tip
on alveolar ridge
(behind front teeth)
then air flow
either side of tongue.
Seems to bother
so many. No end-
stopped Fred or Bob
or even Lou,
'L' seems to like
to start or to sound
like it will go on.
But with me it won't.
The naming buck
stops at Bill.
bw
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