thanks Bill Doug Max (lovely follow up poem to treasure)
re
Could you tighten this, Pat by deleting 'him' from line 2, 'but' from line
4, all of line 7 and the word 'phone' in line ten?
I am rather attached to 'him' as that is sort about their relationship
the but refers to a problem
line 7 is a ref to a dead Norwegian Parrot!! -tongue in cheek!!
interesting -mobile phone to me is a phone a mobile is not so clear -yes I
am an old fogey!!
CALL
they phoned
asking for him
her husband
but she said
unfortunately
he had died
passed away
but she could
give them his
mobile phone
number in Hell
pmcmanus
r951
-----Original Message-----
From: Douglas Barbour
Sent: Wednesday, April 20, 2016 3:55 PM
To: [log in to unmask]
Subject: Re: pat snap 735?? >>>>>>>>>>>>>>)!(<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
Ha, your poem as reply, Max. And so, Patrick, your call has already been
answered, so to speak…
Doug
> On Apr 20, 2016, at 8:34 AM, Max Richards <[log in to unmask]>
> wrote:
>
> I fancy the moment in the funeral parlor
>
> everyone gathered
>
> when the coffin reverberates
>
> with the music
>
> (but which melody?)
>
> of an incoming call…
>
> (During my first wedding service
>
> a phone in the vestry began ringing
>
> and if only I’d run and answered it…
>
> However, afterwards, others denied
>
> having heard it.)
>
> Max
>
> On Apr 20, 2016, at 5:05, Patrick McManus <[log in to unmask]>
> wrote:
>
>> CALL
>>
>> they phoned
>> asking for him
>> her husband
>> but she said
>> unfortunately
>> he had died
>> passed away
>> but she could
>> give them his
>> mobile phone number in Hell
>>
>>
>> pmcmanus
>> r951
Douglas Barbour
[log in to unmask]
https://eclecticruckus.wordpress.com/
Recent publications: (With Sheila E Murphy) Continuations & Continuations 2
(UofAPress).
Recording Dates (Rubicon Press).
Transforming once reasonable human beings into gullible idiots is one of the
biggest businesses we have.
Charles Simic.
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