Fair comment, Max about the rhyme expectation set up, then betrayed. I hadn't realised what I had done with only anchoring that line with 'assert'. It was the final line written and inserted actually, replacing the more suburban-sounding first draft of 'readying to take on/ blade challenges', which also had, I now see, an object too. 'Frizz' I added because wattle by itself could just identify the tree and frizz is how my myopic eyes see it.
Bill
> On 19 Aug 2015, at 11:24 pm, Max Richards <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>
> Romp-ready is suitably cummingsesque -
>
> Starting with a rhyme sets up in me an expectation - not of regularity but
> more word music than I then hear.
>
> Interesting set of verbs - only ‘assert’ is provided with an object.
>
> I like best ‘waffle frizz’.
>
> Max
>
>> On Aug 18, 2015, at 14:36, Bill Wootton <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>>
>> Here it comes ...red
>> the very ground thrums
>> as if ready to burst
>> from below.
>>
>> Dormancy retreats
>> as grass blades pulse,
>> ready to assert
>> dominance over clay.
>>
>> Winds fan
>> rather than chill.
>> Bees lurk,
>> petals provide.
>>
>> Wattle frizz overfills
>> branches' stretching.
>> Everything now ...
>> romp-ready.
>>
>> bw
>
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