This comment has given my poor old head static obvious static or eyeshifted
static connected before and after
Time for a cuppa P statically
Doug - I like it a lot - but would take out the second 'the obvious'
> and the 'there' before 'static'. The first because 'the obvious'
> stated once can be used to connect before and after - and the second
> because I love the gear shift, almost tonal, of 'remains' eyeshift
> 'static'. (Maybe move the position of 'static' ...)
>
-----Original Message-----
From: Poetryetc: poetry and poetics [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On
Behalf Of Douglas Barbour
Sent: 18 June 2015 19:43
To: [log in to unmask]
Subject: Re: snap: at the planning workshop
Okay, Andrew
that's a fiddle I'll take a look at.
& ta to all.
Doug
On Jun 17, 2015, at 11:39 PM, Andrew Burke <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> Doug - I like it a lot - but would take out the second 'the obvious'
> and the 'there' before 'static'. The first because 'the obvious'
> stated once can be used to connect before and after - and the second
> because I love the gear shift, almost tonal, of 'remains' eyeshift
> 'static'. (Maybe move the position of 'static' ...)
>
> Andrew )born fiddler of poems(
>
>
>
> On 18 June 2015 at 12:40, Jill Jones <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>
>> Doug, this is all too familiar to me. The static obvious. I think I
>> was at one of these meetings yesterday.
>>
>> On 17/06/2015, at 11:44 PM, Douglas Barbour wrote:
>>
>>> to take a step forward
>>> outward vision
>>> of the possibilities
>>>
>>> there are acronyms for all this
>>> a way of stating
>>> the obvious
>>>
>>> the obvious remains
>>> there static
>>> & causing it
>>>
>>> all ways to consider
>>> the way ahead
>>>
>>> Douglas Barbour
>>> [log in to unmask]
>>>
>>> Recent publications: (With Sheila E Murphy) Continuations &
>>> Continuation
>> 2 (UofAPress).
>>> Recording Dates (Rubicon Press).
>>>
>>> There is no life that does not rise
>>> melodic from scales of the marvelous.
>>>
>>> To which our grief refers.
>>>
>>> Robert Duncan.
>>
Douglas Barbour
[log in to unmask]
Recent publications: (With Sheila E Murphy) Continuations & Continuation 2
(UofAPress).
Recording Dates (Rubicon Press).
There is no life that does not rise
melodic from scales of the marvelous.
To which our grief refers.
Robert Duncan.
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