Like.
On 23 August 2013 07:54, Bill Wootton <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> Thanks, Doug. Normally I agee with you. Today I'm not sure. The brevity
> may work to conflate eyes to personal curtains but it might sound like the
> canals have curtains! So rather than deleting 'eye', I have deleted
> 'personal', avoiding the line end hyphen. (I've left 'wood' with hyphen to
> create a sort of pun with 'would'.) Also I have inserted punctuation.
> Otherwise, on reflection, my upper case letters look a bit odd and lower
> casing the lot might too. Any advice on that score would be appreciated.
> Now it looks like this:
>
> Curtain free
>
> Living in the full glare,
> never feeling the need
> to close or draw.
>
> Who'd see anyway,
> only the odd roo, wood-
> duck or magpie.
>
> So dawns dawn;
> no sudden light
> admission by
>
> dint of raked rings,
> twilights allowed
> their full reduction.
>
> Mind you it's easy
> here in the bush.
> Apparently in Amsterdam,
>
> they also lead
> uncurtained lives.
> Although you could,
>
> it's infra dig
> to peer into privacy.
> I like that:
>
> strolling the canals
> with eye-curtains
> closed,
>
> inmates knowing
> they can disport
> accordingly.
>
> bw
> 23.8.13
>
>
> On 23/08/2013, at 3:14 AM, Douglas Barbour <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>
> > I like how the short lines work here, Bill. But would drop 'eye'
> completely...
> >
> > Doug
> > On 2013-08-20, at 4:49 PM, Bill Wootton <[log in to unmask]>
> wrote:
> >
> >> Accept your i for an e, Max and the hyphen which i had considered but
> thought looked odd at the line end. What about the title then, hyphen too?
> Re drawing, puns notwithstanding, Owen at least draws down so you know.
> Oxford dictionary says drawing is opening or closing so the answer to
> anyone, given that you have been last to touch them, when asked have you
> drawn the blinds, is always 'Yes'.
> >>
> >> Cheers,
> >> Bil
> >>
> >> On 21/08/2013, at 7:42 AM, Max Richards wrote:
> >>
> >>> Enjoyable wandering.
> >>> personal eye-curtains? - I find myself inserting a hyphen there, Bill.
> >>> Should dent be dint maybe?
> >>>
> >>> Hey,how about this! -
> >>>
> >>>
> >>> http://nq.oxfordjournals.org/content/56/3/409.extract
> >>> ‘A Drawing-Down of Blinds’: Wilfred Owen's Punning Conclusion to
> ‘Anthem for Doomed Youth’
> >>>
> >>> On 21/08/2013, at 7:15 AM, Bill Wootton wrote:
> >>>
> >>>> Curtain free
> >>>>
> >>>> Living in the full glare
> >>>> never feeling the need
> >>>> to close or draw
> >>>>
> >>>> Who'd see anyway
> >>>> only the odd roo wood
> >>>> duck or magpie
> >>>>
> >>>> So dawns dawn
> >>>> No sudden light
> >>>> admission by
> >>>>
> >>>> dent of raked rings
> >>>> twilights allowed
> >>>> their full reduction
> >>>>
> >>>> Mind you it's easy
> >>>> here in the bush
> >>>> Apparently in Amsterdam
> >>>>
> >>>> they also lead
> >>>> uncurtained lives
> >>>> Although you could
> >>>>
> >>>> it's infra dig
> >>>> to peer into privacy
> >>>> I like that
> >>>>
> >>>> Strolling the canals
> >>>> with personal eye
> >>>> curtains closed
> >>>>
> >>>> inmates knowing
> >>>> they can disport
> >>>> accordingly
> >>>>
> >>>> bw
> >>>> 21.8.13
> >>>>
> >>>> By the way, does drawing blinds mean opening or closing them? I can
> never forget Spike Milligan's 'Inside, the blinds were drawn but the
> furniture was real' but am no closer to resolving the question.
> >
> > Douglas Barbour
> > [log in to unmask]
> >
> > http://www.ualberta.ca/~dbarbour/
> > http://eclecticruckus.wordpress.com/
> >
> > Latest books:
> > Continuations & Continuations 2 (with Sheila E Murphy)
> > http://www.uap.ualberta.ca/UAP.asp?LID=41&bookID=962
> > Recording Dates
> > (Rubicon Press)
> >
> > Art is always the replacing of indifference by attention.
> >
> > Guy Davenport
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
> >
>
--
Andrew
http://hispirits.blogspot.com/
'Undercover of Lightness'
http://walleahpress.com.au/recent-publications.html
'Shikibu Shuffle'
http://abovegroundpress.blogspot.com.au/2012/03/new-from-aboveground-press-shikibu.html
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