I like the short drive of it all, but wonder if the first comma in the last line is working as you wish it to...
Doug
On 2013-03-20, at 10:35 AM, Patrick McManus <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> Bill did it smell in the subway?? (or is it only over here??)
> P
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Poetryetc: poetry and poetics [mailto:[log in to unmask]] On
> Behalf Of Bill Wootton
> Sent: 20 March 2013 15:11
> To: [log in to unmask]
> Subject: Watsonia Station snap
>
>
> Ramping off-level down to Watsonia station via
> concrete returning zigzag lands you on asphalt.
> Join the jostle, ready for relay to more crowdplay;
> underneath you are, sub-clay, off-street, car-less.
>
> Bill Wootton
>
Douglas Barbour
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