Thanks, Dominic, Doug. On reflection I have taken the knife to line 11and replaced it with:
Openended readiness is strange hell.
This gives me a forkish rhyme for 'untravelled'.
Also I have retitled it to 'Are you ready?'
Bill
On 07/12/2012, at 12:29 AM, Dominic Fox <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> One should be prepared to rhyme "knife" with "fork" if the poem demands it.
>
> Dominic
>
>
> On Wed, Dec 5, 2012 at 10:28 PM, Douglas Barbour <[log in to unmask]>wrote:
>
>> Most especially, i like the neat turn of it, Bill.
>>
>> Doug
>> On 2012-12-05, at 2:17 PM, Bill Wootton <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>>
>>> Most especially what, Doug?
>>>
>>> Bill withers.
>>>
>>> On 06/12/2012, at 3:23 AM, Douglas Barbour <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
>>>
>>>> Most especially for line 4!
>>>>
>>>> Doug
>>>> On 2012-12-04, at 1:16 PM, Bill Wootton <[log in to unmask]>
>> wrote:
>>>>
>>>>> Two questions precede this snap, Petcers:
>>>>>
>>>>> 1. Can I get away with the rhymes which end lines 11 & 14? (Is it done
>> to rhyme 'un' words anyway? Or is trammel/travel just too stupid for words?)
>>>>>
>>>>> 2. In line 12, is that where the question mark should appear, or
>> somewhere else, or not at all?
>>>>>
>>>>> Correspondence will be entered into.
>>>>>
>>>>> Cheers,
>>>>> Bill
>>>>>
>>>>> Petrarchan argument sonnet
>>>>>
>>>>> Why is it that everything I want to do
>>>>> is a commitment? It's freedom you seek,
>>>>> you say: blank spaces in the coming weeks.
>>>>> It's not like I'm proposing a tattoo;
>>>>> surely we can accept a barbecue.
>>>>> It's not far to go up to Pheasant Creek.
>>>>> Distance? It may as well be Mozambique.
>>>>> Parties, movies, openings, toodle-oo!
>>>>> Retirement from work should open doors
>>>>> Things once knocked back can now be accepted
>>>>> Why want openendedness untrammelled?
>>>>> Wither spontaneity? always your
>>>>> riposte, which leaves me feeling all bereft.
>>>>> Check the calendar for roads untravelled.
>>>>>
>>>>> Bill Wootton
>>>>
>>>> Douglas Barbour
>>>> [log in to unmask]
>>>>
>>>> http://www.ualberta.ca/~dbarbour/
>>>> http://eclecticruckus.wordpress.com/
>>>>
>>>> Latest books:
>>>> Continuations & Continuations 2 (with Sheila E Murphy)
>>>> http://www.uap.ualberta.ca/UAP.asp?LID=41&bookID=962
>>>> Wednesdays'
>> http://abovegroundpress.blogspot.com/2008/03/new-from-aboveground-press_10.html
>>>>
>>>> Swept snow, Li Po,
>>>> by dawn’s 40-watt moon
>>>> to the road that hies to office
>>>> away from home.
>>>>
>>>> Lorine Niedecker
>>
>> Douglas Barbour
>> [log in to unmask]
>>
>> Recent publications: (With Sheila E Murphy) Continuations & Continuation 2
>> (UofAPress).
>> Recording Dates (Rubicon Press).
>>
>> Something else is out there
>> godamnit
>>
>> And I want to hear it
>>
>> C.D.Wright
>
>
>
> --
> Shall we be pure or impure? Today
> we shall be very pure. It must always
> be possible to contain
> impurities in a pure way.
> --Tarmo Uustalu and Varmo Vene
>
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