Hi Alison,
It truly is unbearable. But that word is meaningless because there is no
choice but to bear it.
I worry about his original feelings of not wanting to live because he cannot
find a place for himself within this culture. Even as I pray to the
nothingness I don't believe in to heal his body I know nothing will change
in this world to make him feel he wants to live in this world. That is
perhaps the hardest part--knowing that won't change, even if he survives
this. He can't talk but his eyes are daggers of anger.
I have another son who is like what Chris wrote about. He is the most
brilliant artist I have ever met and I don't say that because he is my son,
he is a filmmaker, a director, a genius as they say. What good is any of
this? He can't cope with people because they aren't as "smart" as he is and
so he has few people to share with. But he flew out to be with his brother
and I believe something in him changed forever.
People have been so kind, including you and all the people on this thread. I
thank you all with all my heart for your kindness.
Bobbi
On Sat, May 22, 2010 at 6:42 PM, Alison Croggon <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> Hi Bobbi, I looked it all up: I don't know how you can bear it. It's
> horrible what's happening to your son, from the beginning. It's
> painful what you say about his feeling that he had no reason to live.
> That's about as big a condemnation of a normative society unable to
> cope with difference as anything I can think of.
>
> I see they use LACTIMIL to treat bipolar conditions as well as OCD -
> so many of the drugs they use are worse than the disease. It was the
> drugs that all but killed my sister. And the disease is terrible
> enough.
>
> I can't remember whether you have other kids - I seem to think you do?
> I might be remembering wrong. Anyway, I hope YOU too are getting the
> support you need.
>
> Take care
>
> Alison
>
> --
> Editor, Masthead: http://www.masthead.net.au
> Blog: http://theatrenotes.blogspot.com
> Home page: http://www.alisoncroggon.com
>
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