Thanks Frederick! Concerning the sun rising in the west, I would draw your attention to the Les Murray poem "A Reticence", which it will be a pleasure for me to type out:
A RETICENCE
After a silver summer
of downpour, cement-powder autumn
set in its bag. Lawns turned crunchy
but the time tap kept dribbling away.
The paddocks were void as that evening
in early childhood when the sun
was rising in the west,
round and brimming as the factory furnace door,
as I woke up after sickness.
Then it was explained to me
that I'd slept through from morning
and I sobbed because I'd missed that day,
my entire lovely day.
Without you, it might have been a prophecy.
(by Les Murray)
Two bits in that I find really remarkable: the word "brimming" (how easy would it have been to write "radiant" or "glowing" or whatever!), and the line "my entire lovely day." (again, it would have been easy to begin with the definite article.)
Brian
--- On Thu, 20/8/09, Frederick Pollack <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
From: Frederick Pollack <[log in to unmask]>
Subject: Re: Eagle Snap (hopefully correct version this time, please ignore previous one!)
To: [log in to unmask]
Received: Thursday, 20 August, 2009, 12:39 AM
----- Original Message ----- From: "Brian Hawkins" <[log in to unmask]>
To: <[log in to unmask]>
Sent: Wednesday, August 19, 2009 3:25 AM
Subject: Eagle Snap (hopefully correct version this time, please ignore previous one!)
Should be:
EAGLE SNAP
The eagle hope
Flaps his giant wings in my chest
Now night is as day to me
Waking I see the sun rise in the west
Nice poem. The end esecially good, with its gnostic suggestion of hope as a reversal of usual expectations, the natural order.
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