Lovely, striking meaningful opposites [wet/dry; surface/undersurface; 2
families; then/now; dire warnings/warm homecomings]---all which floats in
sight above and below consciousness.
Why not capitalise "I"? Despite other caps being absent, a lower-case
personal pronoun jars [me, at least], when I'd rather stay in the poem, not
stand outside it looking at a tiny "i".
Best,
Judy
2009/7/29 sharon brogan <[log in to unmask]>
> today it's the koi
> catching the light
> as they emerge from dark water
>
> your family, my family
> at the surface of dreams
> so thin, that skin
>
> between today, and then
> i go back, again
> and again, i reach
>
> for you but grasp
> nothing but fog, opaque
> and elusive, i wonder
>
> how they will ever get me up
> on that horse, the ranch
> dry, as it always was
>
> snakes in the sagebrush
> rattling their warning
> the deep bell ringing
>
> cows coming home
> home, home -- one kiss
> that's all i ask
>
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