Not unfriendly at all Patrick, and you are most welcome to turn it into an opera!
The pot being stirred is most certainly NOT a potty (if authorial intention counts for anything), rather the "pot" of the swirling rain system (familiar to those such as myself who frequently study the weather radar [I have tried to attach an image, but I'm not sure if the list accepts attachments, you could go to http://mirror.bom.gov.au/products/IDR283.loop.shtml to see one but unless there's a heavy storm system the result will be a boring tan, not violet caerulean etc.]).
Caerulean is the older and lovelier spelling of cerulean. Interestingly, there is a frog in Australia with the scientific name Litoria caerulea, "the sky-blue tree-frog", though it is actually a brilliant grass green. It is so named because the first specimens sent to Europe turned blue in the chemicals used to preserve them. Though I was not thinking of this at all when I used the word in the poem.
Image attachment didn't work I'm sorry -
Brian
--- On Tue, 26/5/09, Patrick McManus <[log in to unmask]> wrote:
> From: Patrick McManus <[log in to unmask]>
> Subject: Re: Swamping Rains
> To: [log in to unmask]
> Received: Tuesday, 26 May, 2009, 5:10 PM
> Brian Perhaps it should be turned
> into an opera with the refrain 'And
> plonked their arse' occurring often and regularly
> Cheers Patrick the oldest and grumpiest
> Ps misread caerulean ( cerulean?) as caesarean! which
> rather sparkled
> Pps bit confused is pot a potty referring to the arse intro
> then stew
> -violetis quite alarming
>
> -----Original Message-----
> From: Poetryetc: poetry and poetics [mailto:[log in to unmask]]
> On
> Behalf Of Brian Hawkins
> Sent: 26 May 2009 06:40
> To: [log in to unmask]
> Subject: Re: Swamping Rains
>
> Thanks Kasper,
>
> your comments made me realise the crass first stanza didn't
> really belong
> with its more demure companions (which can stand on their
> own two feet as a
> dainty little poem), so I lopped it off and went in search
> of a more fitting
> body for its boof head:
>
>
> The great swamping rains came
> And plonked their arse
> Right over Bellingen
>
> Stirring a troubled pot
> Of pixel stew - violet,
> Bottle-green and caerulean.
>
>
> Brian
>
>
>
> --- On Fri, 22/5/09, kasper salonen <[log in to unmask]>
> wrote:
>
> > From: kasper salonen <[log in to unmask]>
> > Subject: Re: Swamping Rains
> > To: [log in to unmask]
> > Received: Friday, 22 May, 2009, 8:32 PM
> > hey there Brian!
> > a snap is loosely defined; some general
> characteristics
> > that I've observed
> > are that it's either a speed-written poem, a first
> draft of
> > a poem, or
> > something else relatively ex-tempore. seems that this
> fits
> > the bill.
> >
> > I enjoyed the poem (or snap) too; the imagery is
> slightly
> > grubby & quite
> > evocative. I see the tonal idea with using "plonked
> their
> > arse...", but it
> > really detracts from the feel of the rest of the poem
> for
> > me. I love the
> > river=dog image, and the blazing maples (for
> heightened
> > assonance, you might
> > consider removing 'sugar'?).
> >
> > thanks for this, and welcome.
> >
> > KS
> >
> > 2009/5/22 Brian Hawkins <[log in to unmask]>
> >
> > > The great swamping rains came
> > > And plonked their arse
> > > Right over Bellingen.
> > >
> > > Summer evaporated
> > > Into woodsmoke as the river
> > > Rose up like an angry brown dog
> > >
> > > Snapping at falling leaves,
> > > And the sugar maples blazed
> > > On the highway with noone to see them.
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > I'm new to this list. Could someone tell me
> what
> > a snap is? Is this poem
> > > a snap? It even has the word snap in it! sort
> > of.
> > >
> > > No spring down here (subtropical NSW), autumn
> full
> > bore flooding our little
> > > valleys.
> > >
> > > Brian
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Need a Holiday? Win a $10,000
> > Holiday of your choice. Enter now.
> > >
> http://us.lrd.yahoo.com/_ylc=X3oDMTJxN2x2ZmNpBF9zAzIwMjM2MTY2MTMEdG1fZG1lY2g
> DVGV4dCBMaW5rBHRtX2xuawNVMTEwMzk3NwR0bV9uZXQDWWFob28hBHRtX3BvcwN0YWdsaW5lBHR
> tX3BwdHkDYXVueg--/SIG=14600t3ni/**http%3A//au.rd.yahoo.com/mail/tagline/crea
> tiveholidays/*http%3A//au.docs.yahoo.com/homepageset/%3Fp1=other%26p2=au%26p
> 3=mailtagline
> > >
> >
>
>
> Need a Holiday? Win a $10,000 Holiday
> of your choice. Enter
> now.http://us.lrd.yahoo.com/_ylc=X3oDMTJxN2x2ZmNpBF9zAzIwMjM2MTY2MTMEdG1fZG1
> lY2gDVGV4dCBMaW5rBHRtX2xuawNVMTEwMzk3NwR0bV9uZXQDWWFob28hBHRtX3BvcwN0YWdsaW5
> lBHRtX3BwdHkDYXVueg--/SIG=14600t3ni/**http%3A//au.rd.yahoo.com/mail/tagline/
> creativeholidays/*http%3A//au.docs.yahoo.com/homepageset/%3Fp1=other%26p2=au
> %26p3=mailtagline
> No virus found in this incoming message.
> Checked by AVG - www.avg.com
> Version: 8.5.339 / Virus Database: 270.12.39/2133 - Release
> Date: 05/25/09
> 08:16:00
>
Need a Holiday? Win a $10,000 Holiday of your choice. Enter now.http://us.lrd.yahoo.com/_ylc=X3oDMTJxN2x2ZmNpBF9zAzIwMjM2MTY2MTMEdG1fZG1lY2gDVGV4dCBMaW5rBHRtX2xuawNVMTEwMzk3NwR0bV9uZXQDWWFob28hBHRtX3BvcwN0YWdsaW5lBHRtX3BwdHkDYXVueg--/SIG=14600t3ni/**http%3A//au.rd.yahoo.com/mail/tagline/creativeholidays/*http%3A//au.docs.yahoo.com/homepageset/%3Fp1=other%26p2=au%26p3=mailtagline
|