Kasper, a poem is not all in the words said but much of many in the words
that are not said.
The tone of that first verse and the 'bow' as a response puts me in mind of
my first stay in hospital for a 'breakdown' (old fashioned word used then).
The shrink talked to me in that tone of voice and I bowed to his will - so
that's how I read this now, and a full characterisation occurs.
'Nondescript' in as much as it doesn't describe, but it sows the seed for
any fertile imagination to germinate. Description would limit it to the
imagination of the poet, and not invite the reader in to create.
Thanks, Tina.
Andrew
2009/3/7 kasper salonen <[log in to unmask]>
> 'fraid I don't see much at all in this. very basic, very nondescript.
>
> KS
>
> 2009/3/7 Tina Bass <[log in to unmask]>
>
> > > and when you say 'it's fine'
> > >
> > > it's fine in the way that
> > >
> > > all your decisions are fine
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > and I bow my head as you leave
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > when you say 'fine'
> > >
> > > I repeat, 'fine' over and over
> > >
> > > until my mantra
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > starts picking up pieces
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > puts them together
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > --------------------------------------------------------------
> > [log in to unmask] http://www.fatmandancing.co.uk
> > http://www.myspace.com/fat_man_dancing
> >
>
--
Andrew
http://hispirits.blogspot.com/
|